Why A Little Sister Is One Of God’s Greatest Gifts

Why A Little Sister Is One Of God’s Greatest Gifts

I’m going to be honest and up-front with you and admit I did not come up with this blog post idea on my own.  A couple days ago, my little sister posted a cute little link on my page about a big sister being the most important person in one’s life.  After we discussed how true and relevant the post was, she told me she thought I could write a great “little sister” one.  I agreed.  So here it is:  “Why A Little Sister Is One Of God’s Greatest Gifts.”

(Photo by Kat Bradshaw Photography)

Anyone who knows my sister and I, knows we are truly best friends.  It isn’t an act or solely just a social media type of thing:  I truly love my sister, and she truly loves me.  I know some sisters fight like a bunch of cats and dogs, but if they dare to look a little closer, they’ll find their best friend.  To be fair, my sister is a decade younger than me, so maybe that has always made getting along a little easier.  I see her like a young adult daughter, and she sees me as her second mom.  No matter what the age gap though, a sister really can be one of God’s greatest gifts to you.  Trust me.

(Photo by Kat Bradshaw Photography)
  1.  A little sister keeps you young, hip and cool. She makes sure you don’t dare to buy that ugly shirt, and she reminds you that “you’ve still got it.”  Even if you refuse to have Snapchat on your phone, she has you talking in goofy voices and wearing cat ears on her screen at the very least.  She gets you to cut loose, let your hair down and to rock out to the latest tunes in your soccer mom SUV.  She makes you go on an evening speed walk when you were thinking of vegging out on the couch instead. She can also sometimes even manage to talk you into staying out past 7 PM and socializing with other living creations other than herself, your husband and dog.  Sometimes……you even find yourself using words that only the “cool kids” are using.
  2. She shares the same parents, siblings and extended family as you do.  The “older sister” blog mentioned this point, and I completely agree.  Since you share the same family, you understand one another on even a higher level.  It’s a common ground and a connection that even your best “outside the family friend,” won’t be able to share with you.  She knows all the different personalities and situations and can give advice accordingly.
  3. There is no one you could possibly be more comfortable around.  There’s no greater feeling than being around people you are 110% comfortable with.  My little sister is and has always been that person for me.  We can talk about anything and share anything without feeling weird, awkward or worrying about what the other person is thinking.  There is zero pressure to fake a “bad day” and zero pressure to be anything, except exactly who you are.
  4. You get a great chance to develop motherly skills and to practice “low-key parenting”prior to ever actually becoming a mother. This may not apply to every sister out there like it does me.  I realize many sisters are so much closer in age than I am with mine, but no matter what, the big sister is supposed to look out for and protect the little sister.  Even if the big sister is only a year older, some kind of motherly characteristics are usually present.  My little sister was born when I was 11 years old.  I was so thrilled about her arrival that I was constantly wanting to step up and play “mommy.”  My mom allowed me to assist her in taking care of her as a baby.  Therefore, at 11, I was learning the great responsibility of taking care of a baby and all that goes with that.  I watched her grow and continued to care for her.  I practiced telling her “no,” and was sometimes the cool person telling her “yes.” I bought her little things, encouraged her, advised her and built her up.  When I didn’t think something was a good idea, I told her so.  When I thought something was a good idea, I told her so.  The same still applies today.  I haven’t had child #1 of my own yet, but in my mind, I’m the second mom of a 22 year old.  I advise her on life, encourage her walk with Christ and remind her that I’m always a listening ear.  We have the “back in my day” talks.  I try to make sure she doesn’t make the same mistakes I did 10 years ago.  I remind her that even if outside people disappoint her, that she can always trust me and know that I’m rooting for her every second of every day.  I let her know when I don’t “like” a guy and don’t want to see him in my home again, and I let her know when I have a prospect in mind for her.  Sometimes my opinion irritates her….but 99.9% of the time, just a day or two later, she thanks me for leading her in the right direction.
  5. You get to share clothes and all that cool girl stuff.  These days, my sister goes shopping a little more than I do.  She has great style and has been in the habit of buying shirts that can fit both of us.  That’s a win, win situation all the way around.  She also readily shares her beauty products with me.  Did I mention she’s also a hair stylist?  Need I say more?
  6. When you’re getting lazy with your goals, she lets you know.  Sisters know our gifts and our skill sets better than anyone else.  When mine sees me getting lazy on my goals or settling for less in life, she lets me know.  She reminds me of what I can offer this world and pushes me to stay at it.
  7. She’s slightly better at TV, technology and all the new “stuff.”  Okay, maybe slightly is an understatement for me.  I’m pathetic when it comes to technology and all the electronics of today.  I know the basics and that’s about it.  She figures out everything from internet files, to iPhone settings to TV buttons for me.  She’s the only reason we have Netflix, and she’s the one who reminds me when “Fuller House” is beginning a new season.  She’s the one wearing the Apple watch reminding me I can check my heart rate at any time.  Basically….without her, I’d still be sporting a Sony Walkman and boasting a TV with rabbit ears.
  8. When you feel like a zero….she reminds you that you’re her hero.  She looks up to you even when you feel like she may be the only one.  She sees the value in you even when you feel like few others do.  She boosts your ego and tells you you’re an incredible cook….even if you’re just a “recipe follower.”  She’s your encourager and your cheerleader every day if you learn how to be a “cool sister” and just let her be.
  9. You have a forever built-in best friend, “Maid of Honor” and plus 1.  Girls can be dramatic.  Really, really dramatic.  Throughout my life, different seasons have made me reevaluate who my real friends are and who they’re not.  Now, don’t get me wrong, I have some INCREDIBLE non-dramatic close friends, but I keep my circle small.  I have a few friends that would have been perfect as Maid of Honors and Bridesmaids, but when it actually came to my wedding day, my husband and I kept things small and simple in that area.  My sister was promised the “Maid of Honor” role since she was born.  When it came to my day, she selflessly treated it with care like it was her own.  She made sure that everything was perfect.  She bought me stuff along the way.  She hosted two showers for me.  She kept me chill, calm and collected throughout the whole process.  Even though I’m now married, I may sometimes still need a plus 1 for important life events.  If my husband can’t go, I know who can, and I know there will be zero drama in the process.  She’s one woman I will never ever have to question and that’s a great feeling.
  10. She always has your best interest in mind.  A good little sister always, always has her older sister’s best interest in mind.  A big sister can always rest assured that if the little sister is advising something or pointing something out, then there must be something to assess.  Though a big sister is said to be the protector and the “second mom,” the truth is, the little sister often takes on these same roles.  She’s the one running to Kroger to get your chicken noodle soup, ginger ale and saltines when you’re sick, and she’s the one checking on you when you were already expected home.
(Photo by Kat Bradshaw Photography)

To sum it all up……having a little sister is one of God’s greatest gifts and should never ever be taken lightly. Treat her great, and she’ll treat you great in return.

(Photo by Kat Bradshaw Photography)

I Don’t Have It All…..And That’s Okay With Me

I Don’t Have It All…..And That’s Okay With Me

 

Hey, I have a confession. Sometimes I really try to have it all.

Do it all.  Say it all.  Hear it all.  See it all.  Save it all.  Dream it all.  Figure out it all.  Solve it all.  Experience it at all.  Accomplish it all. Be it all.

……And the worst?  I often expect others to have it all.

I came to this realization of myself several years ago.  It was a hard one to accept, simply because I didn’t want to accept my shortfalls or the shortfalls of other people.  Though I’ve gotten better, I still struggle sometimes with my standards of self and my standards of others.

Another confession?  I set such high standards for myself when creating this blog that I rarely post. In my mind, if it’s not an A+ piece to me, then no one else needs to hear it.  If it’s not earth-shattering, then I have no business in posting it when the world is already loud and full of countless, self-proclaimed experts (especially when I may overlook a typo)!

But today?  God is nudging me.

He knows I know I’m not an expert, but he’s also reminding me he doesn’t call “experts.”  He gives gifts, and it’s our responsibility to use those gifts and to go where he sends us.

So…..I’m hoping that just maybe, this simple, transparent, genuine blog post will help someone else out today.  Maybe it doesn’t have to be the deepest, the most articulate and the most revolutionary thing I’ve ever shared with you.  Maybe the message is in the shortfall of this blog in itself.

Maybe a little simplicity is what this complicated world needs right now.

So here it is guys:  NO ONE has it all.  There isn’t a writer that produces A+ material every. single. time.  They may tell you they do, but they don’t.  They probably just aren’t sharing their B+ material with the world.

This is probably only half of my writing collection at most. It is full of what I consider B, C & even a few D grade songs. Sure, there are a few A+ ones in here, but I probably haven’t let you hear those yet either.

There isn’t a basketball player that makes every. single. shot.  You just may not ever see them miss.

There isn’t an actor who gets everything on the first take, every. single. time.  You just happen to see the completed film.

There isn’t a doctor who never gets stretched, challenged or confused by a patient at some point.

There isn’t a photographer that takes the award-winning shot every time.  Sometimes even the best realize the pose or setting just wasn’t quite contest worthy.

There isn’t a family, a friendship or a marriage that never ever experiences conflict.  The social media photos people post only give you a tiny look into their lives…..not the full picture.  My Pastor once said something along the lines of, we often compare our lives to other people’s “highlight reels.”  Man, has that stuck with me.

Highlight reels are not the full picture, all day, every day….because:

There isn’t a talent that has it all.

There isn’t a career that has it all.

There isn’t an area that has it all.

There isn’t a home that has it all.

There isn’t a “dream come true” that has it all.

And most important to remember, there isn’t a person that has it all.  Does it seem like some people come close?  Of course!  Sometimes I play the comparison game and think, “DANG!  I wish I could be more like them.”  Does it seem like some families or relationships can come to having it all.  YES.  Some are so close to perfect, that you’ll never even be able to see the few flaws, that only God knows they have.

Does this mean we shouldn’t strive for excellence?  No way!  Does this mean we shouldn’t work to be the best Jesus follower, employee, parent, sibling, friend and spouse we can be?  Of course not!  In fact, I hope you’re working on that every day.  In the meantime, I will be too.

Here’s why we can’t have it all though, guys:  There is only ONE who has it all, and only ONE who will EVER have it all.  HE is the only one who is even capable of having it all.  His name is Jesus Christ. He knew no sin, and he knows no limits.  We knew sin, and therefore we have our limits, but if we serve the one who is limitless…..the results can be limitless.  We can’t be Him, and we never will be.  However, when we put our lives in the hands of the one who has it all, he can do exceedingly and abundantly more than we can ever ask or imagine.

We can and most definitely should strive to be like Him, but ultimately, He’s always going to be above all.

Honestly, that feels like really good news to me today.  I don’t know about you, but for me, it gets exhausting trying to have it all.  It gets exhausting on the hamster wheel.  It gets exhausting being a perfectionist.  And exhausting trying to take on roles and do jobs that only He can do…..and it gets so exhausting trying to solve problems that only He can solve.

There is a time to do a serious inventory of oneself, and there is a time to confront others.  There is a time to reevaluate where your life is going, and there is a time to make changes.  But sometimes?  There is a time where we just need to relax and be content with “not having it all.”

Why?  Well, because when we’re content with not having it all, we open the door and invite God’s limitless power into our lives. God’s power is best magnified in the humble….in those who realize they don’t have it all.  It’s best magnified in those who realize how much they need Him.  It’s really difficult for an arrogant, prideful person to enjoy the abundance of the Christian life. If we think we’re equal to God, and that we have it all, how can we really live our best lives?  How can we really have an authentic relationship?  How can we really see the results we want to see?

When I expect others to have it all, I’m holding them to an unfair standard.  I’m expecting them to be perfect like God…and they’re simply not capable of it.  When I expect myself to have it all, I’m holding myself to an unrealistic standard that I’ll never ever be able to achieve.  I’m simply not capable.

It’s days like today that I think of what the Lord has been laying on my heart for about 12 years now:

“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”  -2 Corinthians 12:9.

Friend, you don’t have to have it ALL.  Please free yourself of that expectation right now.  Why?

Because HE has it all, and HE is more than enough…..  Therefore, today and always, you are more than enough, simply because you serve Him.

Let his power rest on you.

Treat everything like “new”

house-2

“Treat everything like new….and nothing will ever get old.”

Those are the words God placed in my spirit as I climbed into my 2013 Honda CRV yesterday.  Then, I let him deal with me a little more.  Though my car is 3 going on 4 years old, I need to continue to treat it as if it’s new.  I need to especially treat it as new since I’m planning on being car payment free for years to come.  If my car is still looking, driving and feeling great, I’ll be less tempted to trade it in before needed. He’s been telling me to love and care for that vehicle like I did on day one of owning it, but today, he asked me to treat everything as if it’s new.

He placed it on my heart that when we stop treating our blessings as new, it’s possible that we’re subconsciously being a little less thankful than we ought to be.  Maybe this only applies to me, but I was thinking about how sometimes the newness of my possessions wear off for me. When that newness wears off, I can take things for granted, if not careful.  Now, don’t get me wrong.  I consider myself a very thankful person.  However, if I’m ALWAYS being as thankful as I can be, why do I eventually get a little careless over time? I always love that new car when I first get it.  I’m washing it, sweeping it, and taking it in for regular maintenance before it’s even time.  But then, I’ve had a habit of gradually caring about it just a little less.  Gradually it gets a little messier.  Gradually I cut down on the washing and the sweeping.  Maybe I’ll go over just a little more on those regular maintenance suggestions than what I did in the beginning.  Then, as the new body styles come out….I kind of wish I had the newer look instead.

It’s not just my car.  Even the newness of my home has worn off just a little.  It’s 2,125 square feet to clean, and unfortunately it doesn’t clean itself.  It wasn’t long after I moved in that it was time to replace a lot of its original amenities.  It looked so new when I moved in.  Now, when I look around, it seems a little older than that first time I walked through it with stars in my eyes.  I love it, and I’m beyond thankful, but that ungrateful attitude occasionally creeps in.

God didn’t stop there though.  I could probably be even more careful with the laptops and iPhones he provides me with.  I need to keep up with the necessary updates and the virus protections.  I should take good care of my screens and clean them regularly.  I need to treat them like new.

And why do I stop putting my glasses in their case?  I’m simply inviting scratches and damages.

Why does my new purse eventually fill up with receipts and other junk?

Why do I start out so excited about a new side business venture, and then just kind of stop working at it?  “Finish what you start,” is another thing He’s dealing with me on, but that’s a whole separate blog in itself.

The point is this, my friends:  When we start getting careless with anything, we’re in the danger zone of unthankfulness, whether we realize it or not.  Someone out there would LOVE to have what we’ve already grown tired of.  When we get careless, stop nurturing and start getting lazy with our regular maintenance, we’re also shortening the lifespan of things that could possibly last longer.  In the long run, it’s that attitude that causes us more time, money and trouble.  In the long run, we are not really being the best steward we can be.

What about your job?  Treat it like it’s new.  Treat it like it pays you double the salary you actually receive.  Someone out there is praying for a job half as good as yours.

Your friendships?  Treat them like they’re new.  Someone out there wishes they had a supportive friend like yours.

Your family?  Treat them like they’re new.  Your children might be driving you crazy, but someone out there is praying to have just one child.

Your rescue dog?  Treat him like he’s new.  He still looks at you as if you’re new.  It’s that same love he felt for you when you rescued him from that lonely kennel of uncertainty. I guarantee it.

Your relationship?  Treat it like it’s new.  I certainly can’t speak for everyone.  In my situation though, I know there’s plenty of women out there that would love to have someone as handsome, sweet, driven, smart, loyal and responsible as my guy.  Therefore, I always want to be thankful without waiver.

I have to honestly say I’ve always treated my relationship, loved ones and my dog as if they’re new.  I may stumble in the “treating possessions like they’re new” area, but I always remain very dedicated to the people in my life.  Even if I sometimes get bad at picking up the phone, my love and loyalty remains the same.  It seems to be a strength of mine, and I pray it stays one.

Interestingly enough, my romantic relationship is part of what inspired me to start treating everything else as if it’s new.  Yes, that’s right.  My boyfriend is so much better at this “treat everything like its new” thing than I am. He takes really good care of everything he owns:  His car, his suits, his sunglasses, his work space, his flash drives and pretty much everything else. I love that about him. He’s been teaching me the “treat everything like its new” concept without even realizing it.  Best of all?  He treats me like I’m new to his life…but we’re of course increasingly more comfortable and know each other on a much deeper level than the beginning of our relationship.  Still, he continues to make me feel just as special and cared about as day one….actually even more so now.

Let the bible be your guide concerning your own relationship.  It says a whole lot about love, loyalty and commitment.  If you need wisdom in this area, just ask God, and he will be glad to give it to you.  (James 1:5)

img_2193

Yes, many possessions and jobs (NOT good, loyal, committed people) eventually need replacing….but it seems that the longer we treat something as new, the better the chance we stand at it lasting longer (in some cases, forever).  The better we treat anything, the more fulfilling it will be.  Even if something grows too old to keep, we probably made it last longer if we always treated it as new.  The possession may have grown old in years, but it doesn’t have to grow old in our hearts.  If we loved it enough, we’ll dread the day it needs replaced.  We also simply remain more thankful for those possessions and opportunities whether we realize it or not.  Now, don’t hear me wrong here.  I’m certainly NOT  encouraging materialism.  I’m actually encouraging an attitude of thankfulness, appreciation and contentment with what He’s already blessed us with.

When we treat everything as if it’s new….it never gets old.

 

 

 

Key verse:  (In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you).  -1 Thessalonians 5:18