hollymarietong, Author at Homestead Holly

“My Times Are In Your Hands”: Modestly Managing “Mommy Madness”

hollymarietong Encouragement, Motherhood, Personal Growth September 10, 2024September 10, 2024bible verses, christian life, christian living, encouragement, faith, jesus, managing time, motherhood, overwhelm, parenthood, stay at home mom, stress, time, working life, worry 0 Comment

I don’t know about you, but I often struggle to believe that time is my friend. I often struggle to believe that the load I’m carrying is even currently manageable…..or worse – Is it even sustainable in the long run? I’ve learned the hard way that I cannot control much of anything at all, despite my best efforts to do so.

The truth is: Most days it’s a struggle to get even 15 minutes to sit and breathe. It doesn’t help that my mind is programmed to believe that productivity is vital at all times. The biggest problem is, I get overwhelmed by my massive to-do list. I get so overwhelmed that nothing gets done at all. For every big task I get done, two unexpected ones get added. If I do get 10 minutes to try to tackle any given task, I either end up with a phone call, an unexpected favor that’s been asked of me…..or maybe, I catch my two year old coloring on the walls yet again. Yes. Think of “Harold and the Purple Crayon.” That’s our current situation, and then some. Little man always seems to find those writing utensils no matter where I store them (of course he gets into everything else right now, too). He’s a joyful tornado, if you can imagine that.

And the mess. It’s everywhere. I mean, everywhere. Our bar area is covered by random knick-knacks, pages ripped out of books, loose change, pens that don’t work and buttons that have popped off. You’ll also find random chargers, hair ties, clippers, broken toys and owner’s manuals. And let’s not forget the stack of papers I still need to read, analyze, sign, return, file, etc. And the laundry obnoxiously piles up before I can even put away the last load. If I were to detail everything I’m behind on, this blog would turn into a boring book. It all looks and feels embarrassing if I’m fully honest.

“I’ll get to it tomorrow,” I tell myself.

This full-time working outside the home AND as a stay-at-home mom, “life,” is exhausting to put it mildly. And only those closest to us truly know everything my current life entails AND demands. But, I also know, 20 years from now, I’ll be glad I fully took on “the hard,” instead of running from it.

And, I really, really do try. I’m trying to be disciplined, but the messes, and “the messages” on my phone, computer and mailbox often hit me like a ton of bricks. I often feel like the average day brings a lot of “unexpected nonsense” which keeps me from the bigger priorities.

……..Anyone else feel that way?

And….I’ve always heard, “chase 2 rabbits, and both get away.” Many days I feel like I have 200 rabbits on the go and 100 fires burning. And, while trying to figure out which one to attend to first, I get overwhelmed and give up. If my head were a computer, I’d have 200 tabs open and running at all times. “Which priority is the BIGGEST priority?” is a question I silently ask myself often.

And, I’ve been trying so hard to maximize my time. I’ve been trying to work with what I DO have for time, instead of dwelling on what I don’t have for time. I’ve had to learn to be creative. I’ve had to learn to spot “not-so-obvious, opportunities” for time with God, time to catch a breath. Every school pickup turns into a “prayer drive” afterwards. I grab a coffee, a quencher or a smoothie for me, and two dairy-free smoothies for the kiddos. We drive down that beautiful side road on our way home, as if it’s our first time looking at those gorgeous mountains in the distance. We pray, we worship, we reflect. This is how I want them to know me. Sure, mommy probably lost her patience earlier that day, and may be on the struggle bus again that night….but, I want them to know that praise and worship is what I’ll always return to.

Yes. As hard as it may be – I’m trying really hard to give God my first 15 minutes of the day (which is Clara’s drive to school M-F), my middle of the day 15 (or a full hour), and my last 15. I find my last 15 to be the most challenging. Give God your first 15 and your last 15 was pre-marital counseling advice Kyle and I received from the fabulous Rob Simms of Joy Church. I haven’t always abided by this priceless advice, but I also have never forgotten it either. I always eventually default back to this goal. I find it to be so key.

I recently heard another pastor say, “if you speak about lack of time, you’ll have lack of time.”

I recall another saying, “I’m too busy to NOT spend time with God.”

And so, I’m trying. I listen to church services and/or inspirational videos while I fold the laundry, wash dishes or shower. Sitting and waiting on my car to receive its maintenance is now basically a spa day for me. I now see the smallest openings as opportunities vs. a lack of time.

As I write this blog, I’m multi-tasking both kids. Weston thinks we are playing pickleball together. So in between each sentence, I’m literally serving the ball as far as I can across the house. I take my free 30 seconds before he returns the ball, to write another sentence or form another thought.

((Please Lord…..help this blog entry to make sense. Help it to not have 101 errors that I don’t even have time to spot before I hit the publish button)).

So, yes. I’m trying to clean, declutter, organize, execute, and be a whole lot to a lot of people these days.

BUT…..

Despite the mess, despite the chaos….the good Lord meets me right there in the midst of it. Every time. He’s right there with me as I’m literally running through the living room obstacle course of random junk, trying not to trip. He’s right there with me, as I’m launching both kids into their car seats knowing I don’t have any time to spare. And, he’s right there with me as I’m behind that slow-moving dump truck that is going to make me 2 minutes late for that important appointment. And when I ask him the best alternative route when I come upon that train that’s stopped on the tracks…..he is faithful to remind me of the best way to get 45 minutes away, on time. He’s right there with me when I feel exhausted, defeated, unheard….and right there when I experience life’s victories too.

He is always faithful. But, I’m still learning to remember, “My times are in your hands.”

But I know it’s true. I know that even when I feel like I don’t have time, I can be assured that he will provide me with time…even if it looks like more multitasking again. He will maximize what I do have. He’s the captain of this ship after all. The less manageable and sustainable this feels, the more I lean on him. The more I know I need to trust him, to be my strength, to be my guide, and to be the one who goes before me. The more I remember when he says: “But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” (2 Corinthians 12:9)

And sometimes I simply have to remind myself: He can do more in 15 minutes than I can do in 15 years. He can turn it all around in the blink of an eye.

Again, our times are in his hands…..and his hands have never failed…..and they never will.

**************************

((Key verses)):

My times are in your hands; deliver me from the hands of my enemies, from those who pursue me. (Psalm 31:15)

“Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.” (Ephesians 5:15-16)

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens. (Ecclesiastes 3:1-8)

But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance. (2 Peter 3:8-9)

5 Things To Never Say To Your Fellow Women

hollymarietong Encouragement, single life March 18, 2021March 18, 2021babies, breastfeeding, career, children, encouragement, formula, goals, infertility, miscarriage, parenthood, pregnancy, single life, societal pressures, stay at home dads, stay at home moms, women, working moms 0 Comment

First of all, I am going to admit I’ve said things I wish I could take back. Haven’t we all? Sometimes we just simply don’t realize our words are irritating, hurtful, or could even wrongly be perceived as backhanded. We all fall short sometimes, right? Right. Soo….if you read this post and think, “Oh no! I think I’ve said something similar to Holly once.” No need to fret, because most of those who have said something that rubbed me wrong probably don’t even see my blog posts.

However, I’ve had plenty of experiences with the unsolicited advice and unwelcome jabs people like to give. The sweet elderly lady who says one of these unwelcome statements and doesn’t mean anything by it generally doesn’t bother me. It’s the obvious nosiness, jabs and slams that do. It’s the comments from my fellow women who SHOULD KNOW BETTER that sometimes do. But honestly, it doesn’t just happen to me. It happens to WOMEN everywhere….whether single or in a relationship….whether a parent or not.

I hear these stories over and over again. In fact, other’s stories is what ultimately inspired me to write this PSA. Believe it or not, I actually am not writing this because of anything that in particular that has happened to me personally. I cannot put my finger on anything recent that has impacted me negatively. I just feel like it’s time I speak out on our behalf…….and I feel like it’s time I say it louder for the ones in the back!

[If you’ve said one or more than one of these, it’s okay. We’ve all been there to some level. Let’s just all learn to do better. How bout that]?

Without further ado…..here we go:

“Why are you still single? Aren’t you just about 30? Isn’t it time you settle down and start a family? What about your friend such and such? Have you ever thought about dating them?”

Okay, I snuck a “5 in 1” in point number one, but I couldn’t pick just one. I STILL get irritated for my single friends and feel total empathy when they get these kinds of comments made to them. Why? Because I remember this time in my life so well. I made a promise to forever be an advocate for the single women in the world, and I have held to that. I didn’t get married until age 33. I also didn’t have my first baby until I was 3 weeks shy of 35, so I feel somewhat qualified to address these topics.

Just realize the reason “why” they are single is probably somewhat personal. Maybe they just haven’t fallen in love yet. Maybe they’re still not over their ex. Maybe they have some healing to do. Maybe they’re focused on their career. Maybe they want more time. Maybe things just aren’t working out. Maybe it’s hurting their heart that things aren’t working out, and they don’t need another reminder of what they cannot change.

Maybe they love their single life and are open to remaining single for good. Single doesn’t have to mean lonely or unhappy, does it? Since when should a relationship status define anyone? Maybe right now they are just enjoying friendships and hanging out with their fellow gal pals? Maybe romance isn’t a huge desire at this moment.

Whatever the reason they remain single, they probably don’t want to talk about it with someone who isn’t a close friend. Also, they know their age, and they don’t need a reminder. Maybe their age already slightly bothers them, and they don’t need salt rubbed in the wound. Maybe they’re very confident and happy with where they are at, at this age. Maybe “your time” isn’t their time, and more importantly, maybe it isn’t God’s time.

Oh, and telling them they should date their friend probably isn’t some grand revelation they were needing. Maybe their friend is like a sibling to them, and there isn’t any romantic connection. Maybe they’ve talked about dating and just haven’t.

Again. Avoid these statements. Avoid them. Did I say, avoid them? 🙂

[If you genuinely think you have someone to set them up with, that isn’t all bad – you may be able to introduce them to the love of their life. Just be smart about it, think about their possible “taste and standards,” and don’t bring it up in a way that causes pressure].

2) Now that you’re married, when are you going to start having kids?

Again….no just no.

Maybe these newlyweds just want to enjoy some time as just the two of them.

It could be that they’ve been trying, and they’re having infertility issues. Infertility seems to be on the rise, and it’s a very real, heart-breaking struggle. I’ve watched so many amazing people go through this, and the last thing they need are these prying questions.

One step further. Maybe this couple already knew before going into a marriage that one of them is unable to have children. Maybe they’ve been aware of this situation their whole entire life. They aren’t just struggling to conceive – they know that biologically it just cannot happen, period. This couple decided they wanted to be together, whether their story involves children or not.

Or, it could be that getting pregnant isn’t the issue: Carrying full-term may be. It could be that they’ve recently been through a miscarriage….or multiple. One in four women experience at least one miscarriage in their life, and this too seems to be increasingly more common. Once again, this question is the worst nightmare for a couple in this situation. For all you know, the woman is currently in the middle of the emotional and physical pain of loss, right then and there.

Maybe the couple is waiting for their finances and job situations to feel more comfortable. Maybe they want to wait until after they move and start that next chapter of life.

Or hey, they could even be among those who have already simply decided that children isn’t for them, period. Maybe they want a couple dogs, or maybe they don’t even desire pets. Maybe they are two people who want to travel or focus on their careers without any strings attached. If that be the case, they shouldn’t be shamed or put down for it. Deciding one shouldn’t have children isn’t selfish. Having children when one is unsure and “not all in” is what is actually selfish. The decision to have children should not be a comparison game or a societal pressure. It needs to be a personal desire and commitment.

We all have different stories, goals and desires in our lives and not everyone’s looks the same. Whatever the reason, again….never just assume. It may not be what you think, and if it isn’t YOUR life….why do you REALLY have to know?

3) Now it’s time for another! Your son (or) daughter needs a sibling!

Sigh. Can you tell I’ve been through all three stages of life? When I got married, I knew the non-stop pregnancy questions would happen. And I knew, as I was still healing and pumping breastmilk that people would start asking when #2 is coming. I was right. Can’t a woman heal, get used to parenting and/or get just a little bit of rest at night? Is that too much to ask for? Is it not acceptable for parents to catch their breath and to really soak it all in, and enjoy the moments with their first one before thinking about a second? Again, maybe this couple just wants to wait. Maybe they aren’t the type to have their children super close together. [My parents had all of us with 3-5 years in between because that was how they wanted it to happen. I personally loved the way they chose to do it, and don’t know why people may be discouraged of making a similar decision in 2021].

[On the contrary, please stop shaming people that DO want to have their children close together. If they have 6 children and they’re all only 13 months apart – that was their call. It may not be your thing – but it’s theirs. Maybe they’ve always dreamed of a large family and all of their children growing up together, close in age. Personal preference shouldn’t be anyone else’s concern, unless of course, the children aren’t being properly cared for. And hey, if you’re the caretaker or the one paying the bills, you may have a point. Otherwise, no].

But, back to what I was saying: Or, maybe this couple tried for #2, but had a miscarriage they kept secret.

….Or, maybe this couple got pregnant easily the first time, but are experiencing infertility this time around.

……Maybe their baby has special needs, and they really want to focus in on their one child. Maybe the medical bills and intervention has already been pretty overwhelming.

….Along those lines, maybe they feel like they cannot afford a second child just yet. It’s reasonable for people to think about the financial aspect too, right?

…..Maybe the mom even developed some health issues after baby #1? Hey, maybe she already had to have a hysterectomy that you don’t even know about? Women aren’t made of steel though it may sometimes seem like it.

Or gasp…..maybe this couple only feels led to have ONE child. OR….maybe they want to adopt next time, and are waiting to do so. Maybe they even want to be a foster parent. So many possibilities, guys.

I think most people who say/ask this question genuinely mean well and probably don’t see anything wrong with they’re saying, but this is just my friendly reminder: The “when” question is seldom smart to ask. I suppose you may sometimes get an excited woman who will answer, “Oh, I’m planning to be pregnant in the next couple months again, and I cannot wait”…….but just remember assumptions can be harmful.

4) “Oh you’re using formula? I breastfed all of my children until they were 2, and I wouldn’t have had it any other way…. OR…..Breastmilk is so much better for our children. They will be smarter because of it. Breastfed kids are so much more advanced.” [ANY kind of shaming for moms who choose formula over breastmilk. Breastfeeding benefits’ education, encouragement and awareness is one thing. Putting someone down or making them feel like a “bad mom” is another].

And here’s the fourth one I’ve been through to some level. I think a majority of us WISH we could give our children breastmilk. It’s kind of ingrained in us. With that said, I’m here to tell you that whether they are breastfed or formula-fed, what matters is that they are getting fed and growing.

I have a now very healthy, thriving, happy and intelligent almost 2 year old that was only breastfed for………*drum-roll*……6 weeks. I tried. I really, really did.

Now, I don’t feel obligated to explain anything. I just want to. I want to share the very encouragement I WISH I read while I was going through this struggle.

I’m doing this for my fellow women: Looking back, I actually unfairly put myself under a lot of undue stress, because I thought I was “supposed to” according to the societal stigmas. Even as a full-term baby, my girl was born at preemie size. And then of course, they can lose a little weight those first couple days after birth. (She did). That first month was honestly a blur of stress, pressure and anxiety. Oh, I had a great support system: It was just my first time doing this, and I encountered so many hurdles I didn’t expect.

This tired mama also returned to her full-time work only 5 1/2 weeks after giving birth, by choice (I almost returned sooner, but my Dr. was the one who wasn’t ready). She soon agreed. So, there I was, already a balancing act. Since I was 16 years old, this was the LONGEST work “break” I had in 20 years, and we all know, “maternity leave” is hardly a break.

What’s more? So much more. (I think I may do a separate blog on this one day). But anyways, to sum it up in short, Clara had the milk protein sensitivity. Her little cherry-sized tummy was sensitive. I completely eliminated dairy (AND soy) from my diet. Anyone who has ever done this knows how hard it is. Dairy certainly isn’t impossible to eliminate, but to also completely eliminate soy wasn’t so easy. I’m not a big processed food fan, but if it didn’t come from the ground or straight from the farm, even a bite of it was pretty much out for me. Even seasonings or things you don’t readily expect had one or both ingredients in it. I managed a few weeks on a plain meat, veggies and fruit type of diet, and ate the few soy/dairy free options out there, but it became apparent that Clara still wasn’t growing her best on breastmilk. That’s not to mention other additional hurdles we had with it. It wasn’t even just the sensitivity itself. It got to the point that when I went to the lactation consultant, she looked me in the eye and said, “Honey, I was formula-fed, and I’m doing great today. It is reasonable for you to go that route.” Clara’s pediatrician then reminded me that “how I was feeling” mattered too.

And there we had it. I swallowed all of my pride. I had tried, and formula was our way. Soon after making the switch, Clara began growing rapidly and finally graduated to newborn clothes, and then 0-3, and on and on. Now like I said, she’s a healthy almost 24 pound toddler, without any food allergies or sensitivities, as far as we know.

So if anyone wants to shame the route I took, all I can say is, “Her thriving was/is so much more important to me than any societal pressures.” It’s okay, moms. It really is. I decided I will NEVER put myself through this kind of pressure again. If it works……great! If it doesn’t….that’s okay too! Thank God for formula!

*And I also sincerely want to add: If all of your children were exclusively breastfed, I do think you should be very proud of that. I know that’s a big accomplishment and requires so much time, effort, love and sacrifice! I know of some moms who have balanced this task even with working outside the home – (having to pump on lunch breaks and going into the mother’s room, etc. I think that’s amazing, and I admire this balance more than I can put into words).

However, my point: Just know that our paths to raising our children cannot all be the same. Just know that ignorance, arrogance or throwing around the “kids will be so much smarter,” comment isn’t helpful to the mom who cannot make it work. And it may very well not even be a thing like science claims. A couple of the smartest people I know just happened to also be formula-fed babies as well. My husband was one of those stubborn babies, in fact. [While we were going through the sensitivity struggle with Clara, I jokingly asked him if this “smarter” theory meant he could’ve been a rocket scientist instead of an attorney then? I mean, getting through law school and passing the bar exam alone, takes some brains. Let’s be honest].

What matters most of all, is that our children thrive and get to growing. Whatever the reason a mother chooses not to breastfeed, respect it, and mind your own – cool? AND if she chooses to breastfeed long-term, applaud her for a great accomplishment! Let’s encourage one another ladies! It’s already difficult enough to be a woman, and nothing is worse than women tearing down their fellow women.

5) Women should stay at home with their children /OR Women need to contribute outside the home.

To put it plain and simple, both statements are insensitive. Again, the decisions people make for their families are ultimately up to them. We live in a world of double standards, and the comments aren’t always easy to stomach.

Let’s start with “women should stay at home with their children”: Hello. It’s 2021. We are the SAME society that pushes for EVERYONE to go to college. The same college that brings debt. The same debt that makes graduates feel like they need a high paying job to pay off debt. So which is it, guys? I think there are A LOT of women in this world who would love nothing more than to stay home with their babies full-time, but they feel that they need to keep contributing to the income. Also, last time I checked, “living” is expensive, whether it’s maintaining homes, vehicles, putting food on the table or general bills. Some of the same people telling the woman to stay home are likely some of the same people who pushed her into college to begin with. You can’t always have BOTH. Hey, maybe she didn’t even go to college and living is STILL too expensive. Maybe she came into the marriage debt-free and still feels the need to work outside the home.

Maybe it’s not even really about finances. Maybe this mother is just simply a career woman. Maybe she’s known ever since she was a little girl that she wanted to be a mom AND a full-time employee. Nothing wrong with that, right? Maybe she’s always wanted to be a Doctor, a teacher, a lawyer, a secretary…..whatever it may be. If she spent all of those years in medical school, isn’t it reasonable that she may want to continue to utilize her degree? Maybe staying at home all day makes her stir crazy, and it’s just not the best thing for her personally.

In some cases, maybe the wife has the higher paying job than the husband. Maybe they ultimately decide the dad should be the one to stay home. That’s okay too, folks! Maybe she is a passionate dentist, and he doesn’t have a particular passion besides maintaining the home and caring for his children. Rather than pay for childcare, they decide to make him the stay-at-home parent. As long as he is contributing, that’s their business, right?

Now, moving along to, “Women need to contribute outside the home.” Again, how is this anyone’s business, except the couple’s? I know probably an equal amount of moms who work outside the home, as I do mothers who stay home. Both women have a hard job.

I have a confession: [I am currently doing BOTH! Just to be real….it’s challenging, but it’s doable in my case. I realize in some cases it may not be. I work 8-4:30 Monday-Friday on my laptop from home, while caring for my daughter in between. I’m very thankful I’m able to do both, and I give God all the glory. Pack n’ plays and cartoons are where it’s at. And don’t even get on my case about my child watching some TV so that I can get work done]. But my point is, I get it. I get that moms want to be home and raise their babies, rather than put them in the care of someone else. They shouldn’t be put down for it, as long as they come to an agreement with their husband that it’s doable. Now, if the woman is a wild spender or has a huge history of debt and her poor husband is working 3 jobs just to keep up…..that’s another story. God has certainly never meant for us to take advantage of our husbands. However, a mom who is happily working at home, taking care of her babies, cooking, maintaining the home and being a reasonable steward? She’s working, and she’s working hard. Applaud her! I tend to think a majority of women are kind of geared towards wanting to be home as we know this has been kind of a traditional role throughout history. I just think not many feel they are able to do so in 2021.

Whatever the case, a woman is contributing, whether she’s working in the home, working outside the home….and hopefully, in my case, of balancing both at once.

I could probably easily make this list a top 10, and hey, maybe if this goes over well, I will make a part 2. For now though? C’mon ladies. Do not pick on each other’s relationship, baby and employment statuses. How about we avoid the “catty gossip hours?” Life has an interesting way of taking us in different directions than we expect. Maybe what you’re picking on today could be tomorrow’s new battle for you? Let us remember too, we cannot possibly understand what we ourselves have never walked through.

How about we build each other up, be careful about assumptions and offer encouragement every chance we get? Would you like a part 2 of “things to never say to your fellow women?” Share your thoughts in the comment section below!

When God Speaks Through A Border Collie

hollymarietong Encouragement March 10, 2021March 10, 2021adoption, anxiety, bible, border collies, comfort, courage, deuteronomy 31:6, dogs, encouragement, faith, faithfulness, god, he will never leave you nor forsake you, jesus, love, nashville humane association, peace, rescue dogs, trust, trusting God 0 Comment

Almost 6 years ago, I made my way to a couple shelters to look at dogs. It was Good Friday and my sister was persistent that we do so. I reminded her that a dog is a huge responsibility and that we were just “looking.” I insisted that we were not getting a dog just for the sake of getting a dog, and that I would only consider adopting one if I fell in love and experienced a true connection.

The first time I met Rosco, he looked depressed and withdrawn. The other dogs around him were jumping, barking and trying to get our attention. But, I found myself drawn to the quiet one. He wanted my attention, but he was incredibly subtle about it. It didn’t hurt that he was a 5 month old puppy and couldn’t get any cuter if he tried. When I went to put him back in his cage after our acquaintance time, he didn’t want to go. Even though he was shy about it, the connection was mutual. He wanted me to be in his life, and I knew it. Still, I knew this was a big decision and didn’t want to make it on impulse. In fact, I made myself drive away to “think about it.” Within an hour, I drove back to the Nashville Humane Association as quickly as I could, ran to the front desk and said I wanted to adopt “Herman.” I immediately renamed him “Rosco,” and the rest is history.

I never did find out much about his history before life with us. I just knew his heart was hurting and that he was sad to be surrendered. Though he let me pick him up and hung out near me in the beginning, he was pretty introverted in our early days. I could tell I needed to earn his trust.

Over time, I noticed I was earning that trust I longed for. It wasn’t long before he was jumping up on my bed and sleeping next to me.

[Rosco was before the days of Kyle and Clara].

We have quite a history together. Prior to the year 2014 when my sister moved in, I was super independent. I never really had to look after anyone, but me. Between my sister and then Rosco, I finally felt like I was getting a taste of parenting.

The one thing I never did understand about Rosco early on was the fact that he could never seem to enjoy car rides like the average dog does. I thought if we simply went on more car rides, he would grow more comfortable and trusting of them – but he never did. Now, here we are years and years later, and his car ride anxieties remain.

It didn’t take me long to figure out that something negative clearly once happened to him on a car ride. My best guess has always been that he remembers his car ride to the humane society where his previous owners left him and never returned.

Anyone who has a border collie understands what I’m about to say: Their mind is said to be very similar to that of a toddler. They are known to be incredibly smart, and they seemingly have a remarkable strong memory. Their deep thinking disposition can be good and bad. Unfortunately, Rosco spends A LOT of time in his head and forgets how to just be a dog. He seldom understands how to be carefree. So many times I’ve wished he would just wag his tail and immediately accept every person and dog he meets without question, but I know that isn’t him. If he’s scolded in any way, you can rest assured, he will hang on to that correction, until I say, “It’s okay, Buddy. ” My words usually aren’t enough. I often have to pet him and give him a treat to assure him that we are “good again.” Many nights, he goes and lays in his bed located in our master bedroom and just hangs out by himself: Likely overthinking life. The mind is always going, and I see it when I look at him…..especially in the car.

Whether he goes on a short drive to the lake or a long car trip to Ohio, he tenses up, pants and is unable to enjoy the view around him. His shedding gets even worse than it already is (and his normal shedding is already really bad), and he refuses to eat or drink anything unless the car is completely stopped. I try to pet and encourage him. I try to tell him we are just going to see his grandparents. Over and over again I’ve said: “Rosco, buddy. I’m not taking you to the pound. It’s been “x” amount of years now. When are you going to trust me and realize I love you, and I’m keeping you? You should know me by now.”

I found myself thinking about that today. What is it going to take for him to trust me? He’s 6 1/2 years old, and he’s been with me for a majority of his life now. Haven’t I proven myself? Doesn’t he know my track record? Can’t he just simply remember all of those car rides that ended well? Why does he still think about the one that didn’t? Why is that one time still his dominating thought pattern? Why can he not just accept the treats and water I try giving him? I’m trying to nourish his body on those road trips. Why does he reject my help and instead choose fear?

But then, I sensed God turning it back to me. Something along these lines was placed on my heart: Sometimes you’re a lot like Rosco, Holly. We’ve been together a long time now. I’ve proven my faithfulness to you over and over again. Sometimes instead of rehearsing all of those past victories that you’ve experienced through me – you sometimes still find yourself thinking about the traumas and disappointments you’ve experienced instead. At times, you’ve let the bad outweigh the good. Sometimes you get so taken up with your fears and anxieties that you struggle to nourish your mind, body and soul with what I’ve already provided you with. Sometimes you get so focused on the “what ifs” and what you’re afraid of that you forget to enjoy the view and the beauty around you. Haven’t I shown you enough to where you too can sit back, take a deep breath, relax and take in the beauty around you? Haven’t I shown you enough to where you too can “just be,” sometimes? I said I will NEVER leave you nor forsake you, and I meant it. I won’t take it back. You are my child, and I want to continue to take care of you. It’s time you believe me, my child.

…..And there it was.

Perhaps I have a standard for my dog that I myself cannot always meet. Perhaps he has learned to trust me in most areas, but has struggled to trust me with that one. Maybe I’m a little like that too. Maybe I give God most of the rooms of my house, but maybe I hold back on giving him that one area. Maybe one day, I’ll squash all my fears, remember His track record, trust him so much that I forget all my fears, sit back, completely relax and just enjoy the view.

Maybe one day, Rosco will do the same too. In the meantime though, I’ll continue to give him grace, pet him, comfort him, offer him treats and water and dab anti-anxiety essential oil on him – because I love him, and it’s my job to care for him. I’m not going anywhere, and I want to remind him of that promise even if he doesn’t always readily accept it. I will continue to pursue him. He is my fur child. We are in this thing together.

Wow. It’s true: God can even speak through border collies.

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” -Deuteronomy 31:6

6 Goal Setting Approaches in 2021: Vision, Consistency, Discipline & Accountability

hollymarietong Encouragement, Personal Growth March 2, 2021March 2, 20212021 goals, accountability, achievement, bible, consistency, discipline, encouragement, goal setting, goal setting approaches, goals, mental health, personal goals, reaching goals, setting goals, setting goals in 2021, success, vision, writing down your goals 0 Comment

I have a confession: I’m great at setting goals, but I’m not always great at following through. What good is a goal if you don’t follow through? The answer is, not any good, right? So, why do so many of us (I’m not saying you), lack consistency and discipline in these areas? Now, I’m not saying I get completely out of control or completely abandon my goals. I am saying though that I have the habit of allowing old habits, thinking patterns and “busy work” to get in the way. I can be bad about wasting time, saying “no,” scrolling through pointless social media posts and just simply being lazy. Sometimes my focus simply isn’t good. Some moments I can be the, “Oh hey! Look there’s a squirrel,” kind of girl. The funny thing about my lazy and unfocused moments? I’m not actually relaxed in them even if I’m sitting there with my feet up, because I’m mostly thinking of all I have left undone. Wouldn’t it be easier to just get up and do what needs to be done? I think so.

Now, that’s not to say that consistency and discipline is always as easy as it sounds. Life gets in the way. I know with me personally – I have dealt with some non-life-threatening physical health challenges this past year – some challenges that make me tired and cause my mind to shift at times. Even so, I’m reminded that first having a healthy mindset is everything. If I’m not spiritually and mentally healthy, it’s extra challenging to be physically healthy. There are things I can change, but then there are things I cannot change. Getting to know the difference has been an interesting learning experience to say the least. And then, learning to plan after that, has been extra interesting.

However, I got just what I needed this weekend: I received that much-needed “revelation push” after listening to our youth pastor speak yesterday. The message is called, “Unfazed,” and I am linking it so that you have the chance to listen as well. I cannot even possibly begin to give a summary of the message in a way that will do it justice. In short (and what inspired me to write this blog), Pastor Rob was talking about unmet goals and not getting to where we want to be in life. He reminded us to not allow ourselves to go to a place of assuming God has forgotten us. He spoke about how we can wear ourselves out while aiming at an unclear bullseye. He suggested that maybe our targets are simply too vague. Maybe we kind of sort of put a goal in place, but maybe the “what I want” isn’t really all that specific. Maybe there needs to be more clarity attached to it. Maybe we don’t always know exactly what we are really aiming for. That one hit me hard.

As an example, he was talking about a woman he knew that went from misery to a world-renowned speaker. She used to be the type that would write out some goals, put them in her drawer and forget about them. Subsequently, nothing ever changed. However, when she wrote down 4 or 5 very direct and specific goals she had in her life, and actually followed through: It was life-changing for her. Sure, I’ve written down goals before and somewhat follow through to some level…..but my ultimate goals tend to get lost in the shuffle. The results are never quite was I hoping for.

So, I have made a decision. Here is what I’m going to do going forward. Feel free to join me if you want to:

I already wrote down 5 goals that are important to me in the year 2021. WRITING THEM DOWN is the first step. For you, it may be 3 or 4 goals for the year. It can differ from person to person. For me personally, these 5 goals are not over-the-top, difficult goals. They are actually quite simple. Without getting too personal, I’m going to say that these goals are faith, family, health, career and “to-do-list” related. But I didn’t want to miss Pastor Rob’s point, so I got VERY specific on each one. I wrote down everything from the goal of the number of “date nights” I want one-on-one with Kyle this year, to a realistic number of “creative playtime with Clara” that I want to aim for each day. Under each “goal overview,” I made some very specific subpoints. Example 1 for you could be: Growing in my faith. But then, you have to ask yourself what growing in your faith looks like, and what it needs to consist of. So maybe sub-point A) could say: Give my first 15 minutes and last 15 minutes of my day to God. (Yes, this is first on my list, in case you’re curious. Pastor Rob and Pastor Jim have long taught this principle, and I believe it is truly life-changing and can determine everything). B) may be: Do the 52 week bible plan, or it could be, begin physically attending church regularly again, or it may be watch a live-stream every Wednesday night this year. It could look different for different people. Maybe you don’t need sub-points like me. Maybe yours is straight to the point from the get-go. Maybe it is is simply, “attend church every Sunday this year.” Whatever works for you, do it.
Put your goals on display in a place where you will regularly look at them. It may be in your calendar….it may be on your mirror. To keep it simple, you may want to two lists: One with with your overviews and sub-points in your calendar or Bible, and then maybe your simple “straight-to-the-point” list on your mirror, so that you remember your “hierarchy of priorities,” and what doesn’t qualify to interrupt your day. It could even read like, “Did I do something for ME today?” “Did I give my children quality time and attention today?” (Whatever works for you).
Tell someone you trust about your goals for accountability purposes (this doesn’t mean you need to share every single personal detail if you’re not comfortable with that). I have already provided my list to my mentor so that she can ask me how those goals are coming each time we talk. In my case, I felt comfortable sharing pretty much everything on my mind. We talk about 5 times a year, and it is one of the smartest decisions I ever made for myself.
With that said, I suggest checking in with a mentor a few times a year. Choose a mentor that you see as someone who is a couple steps ahead of you in life. Look to someone successful whom you admire – someone you see as being disciplined and consistent in the way they live their life. I see a mentor as being different than a friend: I think of my mentor AS a friend, but I think of her as an unbiased outside source that will continually ask me the hard questions and help me spot blind spots. My mentor isn’t someone I talk to every single day or even hang out with outside of our sessions…..and yet, I fully trust her and know she has my best interests at heart. Your ideal mentoring situation may look a little different than mine.
Cross off goals and “to-do’s” as you achieve them, but remember some goals are not a “one-time” accomplishment – there are plenty of goals in my life that are continual daily goals, in which I must remain disciplined and consistent. I imagine most of you may be able to say the same.
Give yourself grace when you fall short, and then get back to work. As the simple old saying goes, “When you fall off the horse, get back on.” Our days can be unpredictable. Unforeseen circumstances come up. Remember that a little rearranging and an “off day” is okay. Don’t allow one off day to dictate your days in the days ahead. Do remember the fine line between an “off day” and suddenly just quitting and never going back to what you were doing though. Remember having a flat tire certainly doesn’t mean you should slash the other 3. Block out the negativity and the urge to quit. Fix that flat tire…and move forward. Consistently getting back up and remaining disciplined is what matters in the long-run. Consistency is the key to victory.

Now, to end, here are a few verses to encourage you on your 2021 goal setting (and achieving) journey:

2 Chronicles 15:7 “But as for you, be strong and do not give up, for your work will be rewarded.”

Proverbs 3:6 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”

Proverbs 29:18 “Where there is no vision, the people are unrestrained, But happy is he who keeps the law.” (Pastor Rob made this one the key verse of his teaching).

Habakkuk 2:2-3 “Write down the revelation and make it plain on tablets so that whoever reads it may run with it.” (He also shared this one)

Philippians 4:13 “I can do all this through him who gives me strength.”

With all of that said, happy goal setting, and may 2021 be your best year yet!

How have you been doing with your goal setting? Have you been rockin’ that to-do list, or do you find yourself struggling (like me)? For those of you who have reached the next level in the goal setting arena: What are some principles, applications and disciplines that work for you? What is some advice that you can give the rest of us? Please feel free to share your comments in the comment section below!

A Time of Fine Lines: Welcome to 2021

hollymarietong Encouragement January 14, 2021January 14, 20212021, america, christian, congress, donald trump, election, election fraud, enemy, ephesians 6:12, evil, faith, fine line, god, hate, hope, jesus, joe biden, joy, justice, politics, tolerance, usa 0 Comment

Welcome to 2021, friends.

During these chaotic times, I’ve been a bit in chaos with myself.

I know who I am, and who God has called me to be.

From a very young age, I knew he called me to write.

I knew he called me to encourage & to lend a hand.

…But…at the same time, I knew he called me to stand for his truths & to defend his word.

I knew my assignment wasn’t always going to be fun or easy.

I knew I would eventually experience persecution.

His word said I would.

I knew people wouldn’t always like what I had to say…

….But I don’t think I ever anticipated this.

January 13, 2021.

For years, I’ve been preparing for perilous times.

I’ve been eternally-minded since 2005, despite some detours and “trying to forget who I am” a few times.

And for the last 16 years, I find myself constantly thinking 4 words. And they may not be the 4 words you’d expect. They are, “It’s a fine line.”

What do I mean?

I tell myself I’m not afraid, and most of the time, I’m not.

…But a little bit of uneasiness causes me to strongly rely on the Lord for my peace.

It’s a fine line.

…..And I’ll admit, I feel angry today.

A little righteous anger is okay, I remind myself.

…But unrighteous anger and placing the world above the word is not okay.

It’s a fine line.

….I’m constantly having to check myself before I wreck myself.

“It’s a fine line. It’s a fine line.” These words keep coming to me over and over again. I always thought these words were just for me, but today, I feel like they may be for all of us.

….There are so many fine lines I know I must walk. And as I walk those fine lines, they make me depend on Christ that much more. I rely on him to tell me how far to go, and I rely on him to tell me when to scale it back.

…I allow him to discipline me, to humble me and to pull me back in.

So many fine lines.

Do I listen EVERY single time?

Of course not. He never took away my “humanity” when I gave my life to him.

…But I still remember these fine lines in the back of my mind.

I’m called to lift others up…..but not called to pretend there isn’t a real enemy in the world.

It’s a fine line.

“All bliss” isn’t realistic or authentic, and we should stop pretending it is.

At times, I’m called to a little bit of neutrality…..but never to apathy.

It’s a fine line.

Apathy is weak and dangerous….and makes us all the more easy to devour.

It’s one of my pet peeves. But sometimes I know I’m not supposed to “get involved.”

It’s a fine line.

I’m called to love….but love doesn’t mean agreeing with everyone.

In today’s America…..that’s a REALLY fine line, and one of the biggest misunderstandings there is. I’ve said it one thousand times before. Love doesn’t = agreeing. And disagreeing and following God’s word doesn’t = hate. God’s word is not hate speech.

I’m called to be meek…..but not timid.

I’m called to be bold….but not mean.

I’m called to speak out….but not to just be noise.

More fine lines.

I’m called to forgive…..but not to forget or turn a blind eye to everything around me.

I’m called to be a light that doesn’t hide under a bushel…..but not to be a strobe light that blinds other’s visions.

I’m called to unite (with people)……but good must never unite with evil.

I know addressing this even now is another one of those “fine lines.”

Folks, please hear my heart: It isn’t “people” we are fighting in America right now. It is the rulers of darkness – the unseen world.

“Ephesians 6:12, NLT: “For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.”

While people should certainly come together and treat one another with kindness…..there is an evil in this world. We have to acknowledge the ugly. There is an evil that actually has nothing to do with politics in of itself…..it just happens to make its way into politics, because it can accomplish so much in that realm. Evil isn’t clueless. It wants to be seen. It wants to make a large impact.

Evil knows it can make it’s largest impact in politics and in entertainment. Evil wants to work through public figures. It wants to affect the masses.

[What better place for evil to exercise its power than in politics? Whether you love politics or hate them, they have an affect on your life and your family’s lives].

…But still, there is a fine line. We shouldn’t become inundated or ever start trusting man above God. No matter who is in the white house, we know who is on the throne. Just don’t try to tell me Christians should be apathetic here.

….And I now must return to DIVISION:

….I’ve been thinking a lot about the fine line surrounding “division.”

….Not all division is diabolical.

….I said, “Not all division is diabolical. Sometimes division is necessary.” Let me explain.

…..I’m called to unite (with people)……but good must never unite with evil.

…..People should unite with people as people…but that doesn’t mean compromising on morals, values, or the word of God.

….Both good and evil will exist in this world until Jesus returns. Blame it on Adam and Eve and the apple. We live in a fallen world. The love and healing we put into this world can certainly make it a more beautiful place….but it doesn’t drive out ALL evil. It just makes it harder for evil to have its way. Evil never likes “losing people.” It always wants to have its way.

Good should always unite with good. People should always unite with PEOPLE.

….But good must not ever unite with evil.

….Uniting with people, but not with ideals can feel like a fine line sometimes, but they are not one-in-the-same.

….I hope we can learn that difference.

…Again, we are not fighting people. We are fighting agendas, evil plans, corruption, lies……which is ultimately, the rulers of darkness.

…Democrat or Republican, we are seeing the rulers of darkness working in each party right now.

….God is calling us to love and be kind, certainly. But he isn’t telling us to toss his word, and to unite with evil, either.

What am I really saying?

I’m saying we should all watch what we say. There’s never been a more important time than now.

Having a mission of causing trouble on social media isn’t exactly the best use of our time.

And while it’s much nicer, rightfully garners more approval and certainly doesn’t cause any harm, making “love others and be kind” posts right now aren’t exactly going to just stop all of the evil at work..

While there is certainly nothing “wrong” with your post (in fact there is so much right about it), perhaps it’s the powers-that-be at the top knowing nothing about love and kindness that is the biggest problem here.

Maybe you and I already know quite a bit about love and kindness…but…maybe, just maybe, THEY are incredibly corrupt….and perhaps they are the ones fueling all the “hate and division” that is so often talked about.

Love and kindness though does have to start with us though, yes.

Once again. It’s a fine line.

We shouldn’t be getting into pointless arguments, deleting people we love out of our lives, taking each other off Christmas card lists and damaging our relationships with one another. We shouldn’t be cursing, name-calling or making hurtful accusations. We also shouldn’t be constantly pushing forward stories and memes that may very well not be true (and that goes for everyone). There’s already enough confusion out there.

We shouldn’t claim to know everything about anyone’s heart, or exactly where they stand with God.

…..But, the word does say we will know them by their fruit. So again, it’s a fine line. We may not see the evidence, but God sees it all.

Yes, the word says we will know them by their fruit. But this doesn’t mean we should pretend to know everything about their relationship with God, or where they’re going when they die.

And back to social media….

Fighting on social media accomplishes nothing. We all know this. No one’s mind gets changed. [Actually taking action and being the change you want to see in the world is what DOES do something].

….But, remember this doesn’t mean you should become a weakling either. This doesn’t mean your rare “stance post” is pointless, argumentative or not impacting a life for the better.

And as the old saying goes, “You’ve got to stand for something or you’ll fall for anything.”

Again, apathy is so dangerous.

Perhaps, some of us have had to speak out. Maybe we are just fed up.

…..But as I said, there remains a fine line.

…There is a TOO MUCH, and there is a TOO LITTLE..

….That isn’t to say EVERY single person should speak out. You really cannot go wrong with sitting back and holding your peace. When you don’t know what to say….saying nothing is always the better option.

…If someone doesn’t feel led of the Lord, or feel knowledgeable about such topics…..silence remains much better than noise and incorrect information. We should never post just to post, or speak just to be heard. Lord already knows we have enough of that on the internet and on our televisions. Again, if you don’t know what to say, saying nothing is always a respectable choice.

I think we all know what TOO much looks like….but….

What is TOO little then? My thoughts: KNOWING God has called YOU to speak out, to share your stance, to take some kind of action…..and either ignoring or disobeying that call.

As I’ve been saying, there is a time to speak and a time to stay silent.

I was mostly silent for 4 years, except an occasional “neutral” public statement. After November 3rd, I realized my time had arrived. And I feel confident saying that.

As a Pastor I respect recently shared: Do not become angry with God’s messengers. “If they are wrong, let him deal with them. And then watch how they deal with being wrong.”

I believe I am in the right by speaking out right here, right now, BUT if I’m wrong (and I’ve been before)….I guarantee you, he will show me.

If I’m wrong about the political climate right now, I’ll eventually humbly come to you all when the timing is right…..and let you know. You can hold me to that.

I believe I was wrong about politics 20+ years, and even as little as 6 years ago. I’ve already shared that with you…but I do not feel wrong now. The young me hadn’t truly done her research and didn’t yet know how to think objectively. I just knew my side, and I really didn’t want to know the other side. It wasn’t comfortable for me. I had to allow myself to become uncomfortable and to challenge myself.

I hung my head at times, but I realized the value of learning from my mistakes.

I’m sure I’ll be wrong on parts of what I’m saying, but I’m talking about the big picture here. Love me or hate me for that…..but you happen to believe you’re right as well, right? I still have that right too, correct?

I never claimed to believe I was right about EVERYTHING. I hope no one on this earth honestly believes they are right about EVERYTHING….but sometimes it kind of looks that way, huh?

Now, to wrap all of this up, here are a few other things on my heart:

Those who profess to be a follower of Jesus Christ need to remember not to destroy their witnesses during this time. There isn’t any post or statement that is worth destroying your witness over. However, if worded properly and prayed over, you can be bold, while still being kind. You don’t have to destroy anything. You may make someone angry or hit a nerve in the short-term for sure, but a TRUE God-led “speak-out” will never truly DESTROY your witness in the long-term. That would be a contradiction, and I don’t believe that.
People need to refrain from saying hurtful things they will regret later. Some things you just can’t take back…
No matter how much you believe someone to be wrong, deceived, or misguided, they probably passionately feel that way about you in return. Remember that. Again, the battle is not between people. I’m not friends with anyone who I think is “evil,” and I sure hope no one is viewing me that way.
No matter how much you believe what you support to be a stance of love, justice and truth and the direct opposite of hate, injustice and lies……those who believe differently also think their stance to be that.
Remember the “fine line” as you go through life. It’s made a difference in mine, and after years of trying to follow this way of thinking….I decided it was time to share.

The fine line just keeps getting finer. But hey, the finer the line….the more we can look above for help and wisdom. (James 1:5).

We are all a work in progress and America is one big construction site. Let us just remember who is in the center of it all.

12 Survivalist Tips for 2021: Wisdom Versus Fear

hollymarietong Encouragement January 11, 2021January 11, 20212021, fear, food shortages, groceries, how to be a survivalist, how to prepare for a natural disaster, jesus, knowledge, planning, stocking up, stocking up on necessities, survivalist, survivalist advice, survivalist tips, water shortages, wisdom 0 Comment

If you follow me on Facebook, you may have read my post yesterday. It was long as usual, because well, I have a hard time condensing. Sometimes I get off track. With that said, I’m afraid this information may have been somewhat hidden due to length. I still want as many of my loved ones to see this as possible, so I’ve majorly condensed my original post.

As I mentioned on Facebook, I refuse to get into a political debate. These tips should not become “politicized,” and I’m honestly not sure why they would after what we ALL just witnessed in 2020…..regardless of our stances.

This is simply me caring about EVERYONE, regardless of their beliefs.

I just believe based on what I’m hearing and seeing…..as well as knowing that so much of what I was warned about 5-10 years has already happened, that we should be prepared.
I cannot predict what is going to happen or when. I will not pretend to. I said we should be prepared – not fearful. I want to emphasize that important piece right now. The Lord reminds us over and over again not to fear, but he also gives us plenty of insight to know that we still have some responsibilities we must hold up in this life. To me, reasonable and unselfish preparation is wisdom….not paranoia.
I am not speaking of buying out your grocery stores, hoarding, or getting a “me-me-me” mindset).
Unselfish preparation means doing so with the Christ-like willingness to share your “extra” with a neighbor or someone in need.
While the Bible never specifically tells us to “stock up,” I don’t believe that some wise planning means “you don’t trust God enough.” Though God loves, protects and provides, we do live in a fallen world where the enemy seeks to destroy. I think the vast majority of us have also had at least some small experience with a natural disaster or extended power outage. I personally have witnessed “scarcity” in areas.
I’m just trying to remind everyone I love that it’s okay to be realistic and take a few notes from 2020. With further ado……

12 pieces of “survivalist advice” for 2021:

1) Stay calm and stay IN THE WORD….not in the world. Give every single one of your worries, fears and anxieties to God. I made this #1 for a reason. Even though nothing looks “okay” right now…it will be okay, as long as He is where your ultimate trust is invested. He WILL provide, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t do our part to some level.

2) Stay stocked up on necessities. Do not freak out….I repeat, do not freak out, get selfish and buy out your whole grocery store. That is not what I’m suggesting at all, so please do not blow this out of proportion.

However, if at all possible, try to always have 2 weeks to a month of groceries and necessities on hand. If you stock up over time (unselfishly and here and there), you may realize you have a good 2 month supply on hand. And how awesome that you may be able to help a neighbor, an elderly person in need, or someone else God may put in your path.

I was warned about 10 years ago that the toilet paper/general paper panic was coming. No lie. So I always had extra…but I always left PLENTY for everyone else.

I know so many people think TP and paper goods are the biggest concern (and I agree to grab a pack each time you go to the store), but don’t forget that there are supplies more important than paper.

Do have bottled or jugged water, canned veggies, fruits, soups, beans, meats, jerkys, peanut butter, crackers and other non-perishable sources on hand. If you’re a canner…can away all you can. If you have a garden and are a farmer…you are two steps ahead.

I personally don’t like the idea of an overkill of processed foods, but in a survivalist situation: I’ll be thankful for my processed junk. Typically, I try to limit what I bring into the house and avoid sweets-buying, except for those fun splurges that we all deserve. And due to my medical instructions for a high salt diet (I’m seriously not joking), I have to keep chips and crackers in the house at all times. I’m telling you there is still a place for “some” non-perishables.

Getting the “fresh” may not always be so easy and accessible for a time. Unfortunately, we also know the “fresh” doesn’t last long.

Though it may disgust you and your health beliefs, you probably should have some canned meats in your cupboard that are good for years to come.

Also, if you can afford it – a 30 day survival kit at some point wouldn’t be a bad idea.

It’s also wise to keep soaps, toothpaste, hygienic/cosmetic supplies, detergent and cleaning products on hand.

For years, I’ve been buying ahead on some of these things as well (1 or 2 at a time while on sale or as I can). I have a couple shelves in my closet of little things I have extra of. I never let it get out of hand and always use the oldest first. This is not like the extreme couponing show, okay? I have ZERO use for 300 bottles of ketchup. Just remember, if shortages occur, I’m far from the ultimate “doomsday supply house.” Please know that. 😂

Laugh all you want, but after the big TP craze happened, I thought, “yep…. it ended up happening just like I was told it would.” (Still, this didn’t mean anyone should be selfish and fill their whole entire cart. That’s just silly).

…Moving along…

3) Keep a full tank of gas. If you have a habit of leaving your car near empty, I at least beg you to stop that much. This is not rocket science during. This isn’t earth-shattering or ground-breaking, no matter what is going on in America.

4) Keep cash on hand. (Even it’s just $100-$200 in the safe). Notice I never said an obscene amount, but if you can, but there’s nothing wrong with having some “rainy day cash.”

5) I know medications can be tricky, but keep a little extra of your over-the-counter prescriptions, supplements, vitamins and naturopathic oils on hand.

6) Have a good, working, manual can opener.

7) Be prepared for your babies: I thought this one was worthy of its own point though it can go with groceries, because I’m always concerned for our little people: If your baby takes formula, keep an extra can on hand. There are even recipes to make your own formula (click here) in an emergency, but I know some of our littles only take certain kinds. The link I provided will give you some other alternatives and ideas. If your baby is to the cow’s milk point, keep a carton or so of powdered milk on hand just in case. We all know cold, grocery store milk doesn’t last real long. Don’t forget an extra box of diapers and some extra wipes, along with their other little important supplies. If you buy baby food from the jar or little squeeze packs, try not to let your supply run super low.

To go along with this one, be prepared for your pets: Their food, treats, and their treatments, such as flea & tick, as well as heartworm.

8) Keep some extra batteries of all types, on hand – especially AA’s (at least that’s the most popular one in our home).

9) Make sure you have a working flashlight, lantern, some candles, matches or anything of the like. Even an ancient battery-operated radio isn’t such a bad idea, if you can get one.

[Again, laugh all you want. Just know, I’ve been in a prime spot for tornados, power line problems, transformer issues and power outages. Since moving here in 2005, I’ve survived a major flood, a couple close-call tornados, a derancho (I didn’t even know what that meant), a VERY minor earthquake (barely worth mentioning), a big city environment during COVID-19 (my closest Kroger is the busiest one in Nashville)….and most recently: As my friends know, I live 20 minutes from downtown Nashville. The Christmas day explosion was felt in our subdivision. I just happen to have Verizon and Comcast versus AT&T, so my service was uninterrupted. Still, I cannot tell you how many times I’ve sat in the dark the past 10 years. In this house alone, it’s probably been at least 8 times in 6 years… and I’m not referring to little 5 minute outages either). Just now, I didn’t come to these suggestions without some personal experience of what CAN happen].

Along those lines, I personally don’t own a generator. They are very expensive as you know, but if you have extra money sitting around….smart idea. I also recently learned you can rent them, but realize they may be “hard to rent” during massive outages.

10) Tools to take your vitals at home are always smart: The Omron 3 blood pressure monitor is reasonable and accurate. Pulse oximeters cannot hurt. A good working thermometer is also a plus, etc.

11) Turn off auto updates on your phone. (I’m not going to get much into this one or why I’m saying it). Also make sure you have a couple working phone chargers (one of which will also work in your car)…and even a little ready-to-go power pack isn’t such a ridiculous idea.

12) On my mind today: Never depend too much on social media (or even your computers or electronic devices to preserve your precious pictures and videos). Make sure your photos and videos are in multiple places, and print your most important photographic memories, if you can. Technology, social media outages, and power issues cannot steal our prints. I know this one seem to be of less importance than the others, BUT I still believe it’s too important not to mention.

Now, please note: I am NOT claiming or setting it in stone that you will need all of this stuff right here, right now. I’m just suggesting we all take a few notes from the unpredictability of 2020, and learn to expect the unexpected. I’ve seen and heard too much lately to think that healthy preparation is irrational.

And one more time: Our *ultimate trust* has to continue to be in the Lord…not in materials or in humans. However, I can promise you that He doesn’t frown on reasonable and unselfish precaution.

In life, there is a “God part” and a “man part.” We are still responsible to act and be assertive in certain ways. He gives wisdom and understanding to those who ask. When you pray for wisdom and understanding, you may not feel the way I do. That’s okay too.

If you have some survivalist tips of your own that didn’t make my list, I’d love to hear from you (please share them in the comment section below)

With all of that said:

God bless you and your loved ones….and God bless America…❤️

The Great Shaking & Awakening: The Ultimate Fact-Checker Revealed

hollymarietong Personal Growth November 6, 2020November 6, 20202020 election, amos, bible, christian, donald trump, election, election fraud, fact-checking, fox news, info wars, joe biden, media, msm, politifact, presidency, presidents, snopes 0 Comment

“SNOPES said this is FALSE. Educate yourself!” (Inserts Snopes link).

“Sorry to burst your bubble, but this has been widely debunked.” (Inserts fact check link).

Everyone’s a world-renowned expert these days, aren’t they?

“Fact check this, fact check that…….Snopes says…….CNN reported…..Fox revealed…..MSNBC responded…..YouTube allowed…..Info Wars was censored…..QAnon shared….USA Today just broke the news…….even the New York Post is reporting this…..Facebook removed this post due to “false or misleading information,”……Twitter has also removed this and that……Instagram is still full of influencers wanting affirmation, likes and followers above all…..Parler is saying what they cannot say on Facebook….this poll shows this state has been awarded to this candidate, but not this one…..this other website shows this candidate’s electoral number at this and his at this……and on and on.”

It’s a sign of the times guys. Confusion. So much confusion. Lies. So many lies. So many different directions. So much manipulation. So much strategy. Reverse psychology on top of reverse psychology. And again. Lies. Confusion.

And who checks the fact-checkers, I mean, right? Aren’t they people too? Can people not be wrong or have ulterior motives, even if they have the title of “fact-checker?”

I imagine God must look down and fact-check constantly (in love of course). The all-knowing one doesn’t need any article links thrown his way. He knows every truth….and every lie. I imagine what’s actually truth and actually a lie may surprise some of us if we were really see what God sees.

Because we are not God….right now, all we see is a jumbled up mess full of conflicting reports. Both sides claim they feel good. Our only hope at possibly figuring ANYTHING out? Seeking Him. Yep. Our ONLY hope. You read that right.

….And have we forgotten who the author of that confusion and those lies are? His name isn’t God. When the internet and our TVs are constantly taking us in a thousand different directions, there is only one source we can count on. Again, God. He promises to give wisdom to those who earnestly seek him.

James 1:5-6 says, “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will given to you.”

And what is the actual truth of this election? We should ALL want the truth in this life…..even if that truth doesn’t always fit our own personal narratives, right? Even if that truth means we don’t get the outcome we want in the end. We should also want to win fairly….not by cheating, correct?

So here I am making that rare political post yet again. I made one the other day, and as expected, I was met with opposition. I’m still learning how to handle when I feel “talked down to.”

There are a lot of things I am and a lot of things I’m not. However, “stupid,” “uneducated,” “brain-washed,” and “uninformed” does not fall on the list of things that I am, despite what some of my “fact-checkers” (who I don’t remember hiring), may pop up to assert. God knows my heart, and the time and effort I try to put into His word and studying the world around me.

He’s been watching me on my not perfect but SINCERE quest for truth (in this particular realm) since 2015. I knew it would be impossible for me to learn ANYTHING about the real truth of what’s going on in this nation, without taking him along on the journey. Without Him, I have no hope in knowing anything I’m researching is true.

He’s watched me turn down the noise, give up things I once held dear….and humbly seek Him. Am I claiming to know everything out there that there is to know? No. Not even close. Still, I chose to boldly trust in James 1:5-6. I was hungry for wisdom.

However, I do believe that 5 years of extensive studies while seeking him has brought me wisdom and discernment. I do not say that arrogantly, as I do not have any “special inside track” with God that you cannot also have. We can be as close or as far from Him as we want to be. It’s our decision. I am a flawed human speaking of my personal experiences here. Something I should be allowed to do, even as our right to free speech seems to be fading.

And yet…the very few times I post anything political in social media world, there is always someone who feels the need to set me straight. Ironically, it’s often a person I never hear from otherwise. It must be their duty to tell me what’s up I suppose. They post their MSM links and fact-checkers, and they think they’re revealing something ground-breaking and earth-shattering to me. Something I’m too stupid or uneducated to figure out on my own. They try to school me with the TRUTH. Their TRUTH.

But I think what many are forgetting is there is still THEE truth, and in this election, we are struggling to find THEE truth. THEE truth isn’t always what WE want it to be. The MSM/journalism, social media and what comes out of the mouths of high profile people doesn’t equate with automatic truth…and that’s on both sides politically. Even the side I vote on. I really do believe there are wolves in sheep’s clothing all around us.

I believe we have to be really really careful who we listen to right now, and that goes for me as well.

Again….we must look past the surface.

Right now, despite what everyone wants to believe…there is only one REAL, unwavering source of the truth. Our God. He hates lies, deception, cheating and stealing….and He is a just God. If lies, deception, cheating and stealing have been a part of this election (it’s obvious there is SOME level of this, guys)…..there will be a price to pay. It may not look like it now, but let us remember: The truth always comes to light.

With that said, He also doesn’t want us going down unnecessary rabbit trails either. There is a balance. Even on my side of the coin, I realize not everything that is out there is factual. Sometimes I’ll be scrolling past a post in favor of my candidate or against his opponent and think, “well, I think that’s a bit out of context, or I don’t think that one is actually true.” I’m objective enough to realize that even in my world where I want and believe certain things, I may not be able to trust every “source.” I’m not delusional. I’m also not too proud to admit I don’t always have a great answer for everything.

Still, I am VERY much my own person. I have never been easily influenced, and I never will be. I’ve never pandered or simply participated in what’s popular. If I don’t fit in? Oh well, I guess! (Just ask those who have known me for 30+ years).

You can bully me with your truths, thoughts and opinions all day long, but rest assured…..I’m a person of conviction. My convictions are solid, and I don’t allow anyone or anything (except God’s word) to tell me what those convictions will be and won’t be. I personally think it’s a mixture of both hilarious and infuriating that celebrities think they have the authority to tell ME how to vote….as if I’m somehow less than them. I also find it equally infuriating when people take what the media says about my candidate’s character and automatically decides that what is alleged about his character….is also true of MY character as well.

That’s the power of the media, folks.

Just when I was starting to think that the only scriptures so many people remembered from the Bible these days are the verses, “Judge not” and “Love your neighbor”….I find myself getting judged and experiencing the opposite of love from those who are pounding the “love drum.” With that said, explain to me, how I’m being loved AND not judged when you make assumptions about my character and tell me I cannot believe how I feel led to believe?

Now, this is kind of where the rubber meets the road in my life. I don’t know if I was disobedient in not sharing this 5-6 years ago, or if it was always simply meant for today. But I do have a reason for telling all of you this (deep breaths):

Once again, I am my own person. While I ended up staying on the path my parents raised me on, they will both tell you, I came to where I am today because I really studied and sought the Lord. I do not follow Him because of “what’s been fed to me.” I wanted to figure out what *I* really believe and why. I began what I would call an imperfect and genuine (not an “I was raised this way”) journey of faith when I was 20 years old. There have been a lot of bumps and bruises along the way. I haven’t always listened, and I haven’t always been obedient…..but man, He always pulls me right back in.

What few know about me is that I went on a MAJOR “truth quest” right before president Trump even announced he was running for president. I’m referring to the year 2015, before we even really knew who would be in the primaries.

First of all, I am not claiming to have a gift of prophecy. I think this is something I must be very careful about. I am not claiming that God tells me ground-breaking insights every single day. I am certainly not a physic or a fortune teller (the Bible forbids me of that anyways). The point is, I’m just an average person who genuinely sought His guidance.

While I won’t get too much into what put me on this quest, we will just say keep it simple and say I had a very detailed and descriptive dream one night. And then, I had another. These dreams were definitely not my favorite dreams, but looking back….they were needed dreams. While I wasn’t living a crazy lifestyle – I was a bit “in the world.” I wasn’t just in the world – I was on top of the world.

I had just walked the red carpet and had been jamming out to Miley’s “Party in the USA” in my fancy all-expenses paid hotel room nights before (Arnold Schwarzenegger was one of the many celebrities staying there at the same time as me if that tells you anything. I was treated like VIP royalty and sipping my Starbucks while my stylist was getting me ready for my next camera appearance. Later that night, my limo driver would escort my sister and I to dinner. I didn’t need my car. I had all those “black secret service” looking vehicles to transport me around.

……It was the most important I ever felt.

While I still wasn’t that important in the eyes of the world…..I had a small taste of what the catering and the pampering felt like. This experience was just kind of the cherry on top of all the exciting things that had been happening to me for years. It took me 10 years to get to this point of royal treatment, and I wasn’t about to let it rain on my parade.

Life was undoubtedly hard on me in many ways (which few know about), but I told myself the most successful people often have to face the most adversity. I was okay with getting beat up and bruised to reach the top of the mountain….and man, did I suffer injuries….but I also reached new heights. I took in views that I never thought I’d get to see. I was on the “inside.” Life was great. I was on my way. Or so I thought.

…But my bubble was soon about to burst. I was about to feel a weight on my chest: I wasn’t living in Nashville to catch my big break….or *sigh*…..to even be liked. I was the world’s most non-confrontational person, and I REALLY liked to be liked. THAT was a tough one for me.

And here we are at…the dream. Just days after the most exciting week of my life (up to that point), I woke up in the middle of the night from the dream I’d never forget. I’ve always been a dreamer, but this dream was in a league of it’s own. I had never experienced anything quite like it. (This was all pre-Kyle and Clara). Therefore, my sister and dog Rosco were the only ones in the house with me. I woke up shaking and my head was throbbing. I felt like I had been through a REAL life battle, but it had been in my dream. Why did my body actually feel like I had just been through a real war?

As I described the dream to my sister in vivid detail, it all became clear that it was a spiritual dream that would change me. I know, I know. You’ve probably heard people say something like this before. Therefore, I won’t get into specifics, I will just tell you this:

I believe our time is short. I just do not know how short. Remember, only He knows the day or the hour, so I’m not going to make any predictions. That’s not my place. We’ve been in the last days, but since 2015, I’ve felt it very strongly that we are in the last, last days. Remember 5 years in Heaven is not like it is here on earth. Five years equals nothing compared to eternity. It doesn’t even make up a drop in a bucket.

To put it mildly: I saw chaos in my dream, and I experienced severe persecution. I was surrounded, and yet I was protected. Fully protected. I was there to help, but I wasn’t getting through. “Wolves in sheep’s clothing” circled me, threatened me, and berated me…..but no one was ever able to make me submit to their plans for me. No one was ever actually able to hurt me. I was in the minority, but I knew I had to stand firm. I had to continually “look past the surface” of those around me. And I won’t get into specifics, but a sharpie marker out of all things (because it’s “permanent” was being used in a very corrupt way in this particular dream). When I saw the sharpies in the news with the election, I couldn’t help but remember that part of my dream. Sure, I don’t think the sharpies are the *most significant* part of the election, but man….it weirded me out a bit. And then, there was a “second scene” in my dream, which I didn’t realize at the time matched up with prophecy in the Bible.

(I’m sure someone is reading this right now and laughing. Laugh away. It won’t hurt my feelings. My skin is thicker than it was in 2015).

My main point of this (though the dream was very end times), was that God was telling me to wake up to “less obvious truths,” and to look past the surface of the people and the situations around me. He even woke me up out of my sleep.

….I experienced a shaking and an awakening (literally).

Not long after, I had another dream. Without going into much detail, several things from this dream have come to pass in this country the last few years. During the time of my dream, I didn’t even know these issues were “on the table.” And let’s just say, I experienced some similar “incidents” during COVID-19.

The full content of my dreams isn’t nearly as important as the fact that I was forced to wake up from my slumber. I was told it was time to let my worldview be challenged…and time to face some hard truths I may not want to face.

Please understand, I am very sensitive to his spirit. I never want to be deceived, or to deceive others. This is why I’m not declaring any “for sure claims.”

This is not a “believe me or you’re not saved,” kind of declaration.

I also do not believe every single event that happens in our lives is to be shared in their entirety, but I do speak up when I feel that nudge of His.

So with the dreams? God put it on my heart that wanted me to number my days and to start focusing on what was most important. I knew he wanted me to start looking past what I see on the surface. This meant a lot of things. He wanted me to realize that the red carpet has snags and stains that aren’t always visible to the naked eye. I also realized he was dealing with me about the media. He challenged everything I believed about my “role models” and people in the public eye.

As a journalist, this was a really really tough one for me. He soon let me know he was shedding the “pop culture” writing away from my life.

He challenged me on politics. I once thought that it was all about “Democrat or Republican.” He allowed me to see that as politics stood, the divide between the two “party terms” wasn’t as real as I had once believed. The two were ultimately ran by the same world system. I began to see the deception…

I once thought that if I voted a certain way, I was definitely honoring him. In that moment, my political affiliation became, “independent”….though if we are talking about liberal vs. conservative, I think anyone who knows me, knows which I am and will always be. So, let me be clear: I look at everything from economy to healthcare to everything in between….but I will never vote for someone who I believe will further the war on Christians. And yes, there is a war. Do not tell me that there isn’t (this is a different topic for a different day).

I soon came to find that this media/journalism world I loved wasn’t what I thought it was. These newscasters and journalists weren’t telling me the truth about politics….or much of anything really. I started to see that they were strategical in the stories they chose to push. Like a child fascinated by a shiny object, they knew what stories to use to distract the people from something bigger and more important. I had been taking the bait for years. That candidate I voted for when I was 18 years old? I no longer trusted him.

Remember once again, this was BEFORE I knew about Donald Trump. This was BEFORE I heard him say the words, “fake news.” Around that time, I started researching and looking into every alternative outlet I could. Little by little, I began to read and watch horribly disturbing information. Keep in mind – I didn’t always accept everything I was reading and hearing as “absolute truth.” I took everything like a grain of salt, continued to pray and ask God for wisdom. I knew rabbit trails were dangerous, and if I felt myself getting even close to one….I’d shut down my studies for a bit.

In my mind, I developed kind of a system. I had a “Wow, there’s no disputing that,” category, “A maybe,” “A probably not,” and a “No way” category. I tucked away what I was learning, yet still lived life and had fun. I never once pushed my views on anyone. In fact, I was scared to share what I was learning with most people, because I feared they would think of me as crazy.

I spent hours upon hours studying. There were times I felt that my studies were confirmed, and other times, where I still wasn’t (and am maybe still somewhat unsure).

With that said, instead of going out and living my old lifestyle, I spent more time studying history and looking into what was being “kept” from all of us. At times, it got heavy. There were times where I felt God’s nudge to get solely back into the word and to watch something uplifting instead. There were times I just needed to watch “The Bachelor” for a good laugh and light-heartedness. There were even times where I would stay away from the “scary stuff” for a good month or two at a time. It was a balance. I didn’t want to become too inundated in the negative, fear the devil or get into anything too crazy and out there.

By that time, those millions of views I had on my pop culture articles? All gone. In fact, so many of the articles I had worked so hard on years before disappeared into thin air. My writing wasn’t going in the direction I thought after all. I had zero future in the media.

My money-making website closed down. I knew without a shadow of a doubt I needed to do this blog instead…so I started this in 2015. I still have about 30 drafts I’ve never published. Why? I didn’t want to fight. I didn’t want controversy. I still wasn’t ready for people to possibly not like me and want to unfriend me.

So, I chose the “comfortable middle ground,” which also meant probably not all that many people were reading it. While I can see the stats and they aren’t bad….I know I don’t have near the “following” I once had when I was writing about the “world” and writing what people like to read. Those days are now over.

I am now okay with that, because I know reaching ONE person for Christ is more important than reaching the masses with the temporary and the fleeting.

I accept that I won’t always be popular, and that I may just be that “kooky Christian” to you. That’s okay. It’s a title I’m blessed to have, because I know no matter what the outcome of this election is, I have hope beyond this world. I have the hope of Heaven. If that makes me kooky….then so be it.

I personally care about the eternal over the temporary. I hope you do too.

Now to bring it all around. Some of you may have laughed at my dreams and backstory, but instead of making some of you laugh again….your laughs will probably now turn to anger. This is that time that I will likely ruffle feathers.

Fast forward to primary election time. As soon as “said candidate” announced their run, I felt a stirring in my soul. Though there were many candidates in front of my eyes, I kept going to the unlikely choice. As a believer, you’d think I’d go for one of the ones most openly declaring their faith. You’d think I’d go for “pastoral, kind or gentle”….but I didn’t. Just as I had learned earlier….there was so much past the surface I couldn’t see, but this time I knew it. (Now, Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see – Hebrews 11:1) comes to mind as I write this.

This time I chose to go against my logical thinking. I knew it was going to take ALL of us a long time to see God’s plan in this. It didn’t make sense to me in some ways. And yet, I knew that candidate was made for this hour.

It was odd at the time, because I remember thinking….but this isn’t logical.

“I don’t operate on the logical,” was what I sensed from the Lord.

….But wait, there’s more:

While I cannot remember the exact wording of everything that came over me as I spent time with God, here is my very paraphrased version. No this was not audible: “Are you really seeking me, or just looking at what you see on the surface? Far too many of those who call themselves Christian and Pastor are not getting my work done. They are not standing up for the truth. I am seeing too much weakness, too much pandering. They are not exposing corruption, wrongdoing. When they don’t do what I need…I have to use someone else. Do you trust me that I don’t always work in obvious ways? Do you trust that sometimes you have to really come to me in prayer for true wisdom rather than just pick the “obvious” choice…..and are you willing to go against what most of your peers (even Christians) are saying? Many of your fellow Christian friends do not like this candidate and won’t for some time…but trust me here. Even if you stand alone for awhile.”

Again. This is a paraphrase. I want to be careful when it comes to “speaking for God.” I do not speak for God. He speaks for God. I think this is much of the reason that it’s taken me 5 years to share this post. I also know I can talk to one Christian, and they’ll claim God told them another candidate or another story. I’m just telling you about what I experienced in MY life. I think I’ve kept it under wraps for too long. And I don’t know now WHY is the time to say all of this really? I just know now is the time….

Those drafts I told you about? I’ve had drafts in my inbox for YEARS that I never posted revealing who I support and why. It’s kind of a shame because sometimes I spent HOURS on these posts before talking myself out of them.

But to bring it back around, I began studying scripture and seeing how this could all line up. Now, I realize, Jesus is Lord of ALL. Not just America. If you’re looking for the exact words in the Bible of “You need to vote for said candidate”…you won’t find it. Yet, I believe he provides clues to those who are really willing to pray and dig in.

I also soon found out that some had been prophesying about this very same candidate (one of these people died in the year 2007, long before this candidate ever announced he was even running for the presidency). And yet, this person said he would lead our country and become a trumpet for truth. He also said that all major news outlets would eventually have to say what GOD wants to say. I found several other people who were thinking just as I was. They were interested in the book of Amos (especially scriptures like Amos 3:6).

I had goosebumps. I began reading scriptures that further gave me peace about this direction I was heading. I STILL told myself, well don’t read too much into everything. You have to be careful about prophecies, people claiming to hear from God. I suppose there can be coincidences, etc. etc.

But still, I deep down kept believing this candidate was going to shake things up in the last, last days. Why wouldn’t God want to expose corruption before Jesus returns? Why wouldn’t there be a big “come to Jesus because he’s ALL we have” event before he returns? We have to get to a place of revival somehow right? We have to come to a place where our faith is stretched, and we are down on our knees. We have to come to a place of uncertainty to TRULY seek the certain one, don’t we? If everything is in “peace and harmony” and we are just living in our entertainment bubble….we can miss a WHOLE lot.

I even began to understand why he had to be a bit loud and abrasive to do it. Sometimes gentle, slow and monotone just doesn’t get the job done.

We needed a trumpet….not a harp.

We weren’t listening. The other candidates weren’t going to bring us to any kind of a higher truth, though I believe at least a couple in the running had the best of intentions.

The media had been our ultimate source. We believed “presidential” was of the utmost importance. We believed the president of the United States must look, talk and act a certain way, without ever questioning any wars, our financial ruin, or why we were all struggling on so many levels.

Truth is so much more important than tone…..and sometimes truth has to get a little loud. Sometimes you have to sound the trumpet, I realized.

We had been looking for our answers from the classic 3-piece suit well-spoken man, rather than above. We thought just because he donned a flag pin that he was FOR US.

These politicians were all telling and promising us the same things – just in slightly different ways We had developed what we thought the “logic” was for how a president should look and sound. We took what the Bible said about being “kind” and assumed that kindness is ultimately what is needed in a world leader….every single time. We assumed that a choice word here or there while addressing the nation meant God had zero plans to use that person for the good….didn’t we?

Sorry to ruffle feathers, but…..when God couldn’t find the obvious “pastoral choice” in the Bible…he went on to someone else. He used the flawed time and time again. Can he not still do that today?

I was stretched, and I was challenged.

I slowly began to confess to a few very very close Christian people who I believed our president should be/was going to be whether people liked it or not (and this was before the primary election). One or two people agreed with me….the rest talked about tone, the nuclear button and used words such as “unhinged.”

“I’m sorry guys…but I’m not backing down here. I know he’s rough around the edges. He’s even going to make me bite my nails at times. I’m going to wish more than anything he would hire me as his speech writer, but of course he won’t. But you just wait and see…. He is a bull in a china shop….and there is good reason the media cannot stand him. Take notice of that. He’s going to say some pretty outrageous statements sometimes. It’ll ruffle feathers….but eventually you’ll see what I see,” I would say.

There were those times I wondered if I could be wrong. I mean I’ve been wrong before. I will be the first to admit that I have been wrong on some pretty important issues throughout my life/will be wrong on more in the future, but deep down, I knew I wasn’t wrong this time. I began to see this person’s REAL heart more and more: Not the heart that was being “reported” to me. Still, I told God I wanted to “see more,” and that if what I heard from Him wasn’t correct…I wanted Him to show me.

Around that time, I walked into my workplace cubicle, just as I always do. I didn’t really pay attention to the fact that my Bible was being held open with my printer cord. I was just kind of doing my thing, when a fellow Christian co-worker came over. If I can recall correctly, I believe we were even talking about the upcoming primaries. I told them what way I was leaning and why.

Eventually they said, “Hey, did you notice your Bible is being held open with your printer cord? Or did you do that?”

My reply was, “I didn’t do that. Did you?”

“No,” they replied.

“Why don’t you see what’s on those pages?”

……I looked down, and there it was again. The book of Amos. A book that I’ve paid almost no attention to throughout my life. A book that isn’t one of the wordiest books of the Bible. If my Bible was going to randomly open to a section I frequently looked at, I can assure you it wouldn’t have been Amos.

“It’s the book of Amos,” I replied.

“And honestly, I’m weirded out because this is the book that’s been on my heart concerning the upcoming election.”

….And here is just a snapshot of what I found:

⁶Whether a trump shall sound in a city, and the people shall not dread? Whether evil shall be in a city, which evil the Lord shall not make? (Shall a trumpet sound in a city, and the people have no fear? Shall evil be in a city, which evil the Lord did not send?/which evil the Lord shall not come to fight against?)

⁷For the Lord God shall not make a word, no but he show his private to his servants (the) prophets. (For the Lord God shall not do anything, unless first he tell his secret, or his private, plans to his servants, the prophets.)

⁸A lion shall roar, who shall not dread? the Lord God spake, who shall not prophesy? (A lion shall roar, who shall not be afraid? the Lord God hath spoken, who shall not prophesy?)

To sum Amos up: Amos was a fiery prophet with a powerful message. He was concerned about the “little man.” He didn’t like oppression, and he didn’t like mistreatment of the poor. He hated corruption and injustice. He challenged the establishments around him, and he wasn’t exactly polite in doing so. And God used Him. Big.

….And then the goosebumps ensued for both of us.

I quickly asked another Christian co-worker if they were the one who had opened my Bible. I knew it was probably only one of two people. That person also denied touching my Bible.

…More goosebumps.

….Out of ALL the pages.

Spoiler alert: I never found “the person.”

Now, it’s important to say this kind of thing does not happen to me every day. I don’t think we always get a big grand sign, but I believe this is that rare time I was meant to.

And as I said, as time went on, I saw the things I had dreamed and studied come to pass. I believe we are still in the middle of that right now.

Do I know EXACTLY what is going to happen with this election? I do not. However, I like to think I have a good idea. But still, that is where faith and HIS WISDOM comes in.

I’ve just simply held back for way too long. I’ve let important drafts sit in my draft box for way too long. I don’t like conflict. I like encouragement. I like to think this post even now contains some of that.

However, guys….let me leave you with this: If we are looking to our televisions, iphones and computers for the full truth right now, we aren’t going to find it. I’ve known that since 2015, and though I certainly research and sometimes even repost something I’ve read….I certainly know it now. I believe God knew ahead of time we were going to enter a great “shaking and awakening.”

I was somewhat prepared for this hour. Some things have been a little crazier than I pictured….but I’m not shell-shocked. I wasn’t blindsided.

But here’s the deal. Here is what is right in front of us:

People are so adamant about “fact-checking” right now that I think some would try and fact-check Jesus if he appeared before them….especially if he told them anything they didn’t want to hear.

Just remember “fact-checkers” are people too. People are flawed, and I’m one of them. Maybe that is why I waited FIVE years to share this post, and now I’m only sharing it as the election hangs by a thread.

There is only one who isn’t flawed. His name is Jesus. He is our ultimate source of knowledge. The only true fact-checker. He is the one who knows this election inside and out: He knows what happened and didn’t happen. He knows where fraud is taking place, and where maybe others are overreacting to something that isn’t there.

But here’s a challenge, instead of only looking to what “could be true,” “is hopefully true,” “probably true,” “what we want to hear,” or “not want we want to hear,” how about we all come to the one who PROMISES to give wisdom to those who ask? His wisdom is better than any report out there. How about we call each other and pray? I wouldn’t say that to you if I hadn’t been doing the same. To date, I’ve prayed with 6 separate people over the phone….because “where two or more are gathered.”

Like I said….I don’t know the end result of this moment in time….but I do know the end, end result. I know what the last page of the Bible says. I know who wins, and I take comfort in that. I look forward to the day in which we don’t have to worry about what’s true and what isn’t. There aren’t any fact-checkers or doom and gloom news in Heaven – just facts and peace.

I absolutely believe we should stay informed. It’s good to share our findings, our experiences and to discuss this present time. However, until we get serious about our most high, we cannot see or hear clearly. So, where is your ultimate information coming from? Who is your ultimate source? Who is your ultimate fact-checker? Who is your ultimate news source? Politifact, Snopes, CNN, Fox………or Jesus?

You are not the ultimate expert. I am not the ultimate expert. Let’s ultimately leave this to the one who is.

Musings of a Multi-tasking Mommy

hollymarietong Encouragement, Personal Growth October 11, 2020October 11, 2020authenticity, balance, being a mom, empowerment, encouragement, home life, life balance, managing the house, mommy, new mom, parenting, toddler, toddlers, working mom 0 Comment

In order to be a blogger of any value, I must be transparent. I know how this works. America is craving authenticity, so I am going to try to give you EVEN MORE of that from now on. So, please allow me to reintroduce myself, and to welcome you to the musings of a multi-tasking mommy.

Hi. I’m Holly Tong-Cokkinias. My maiden name, as well as my married name puzzles everyone I meet. I never get through explaining or spelling. I am thankful for the perfect built-in ice breaker, however. I’ve also always liked to be a little unique. So, when it comes to last names – I’ve quite possibly hit the jackpot. (Yes. I’m already thinking about the day I try to teach our daughter how to write her full name).

I am sometimes messy, and I truly hate it. I am somewhat unorganized. With that said, I am all the same obsessive about a clean, orderly house. Go figure, right? I love the idea of purging, yet I still somehow have way more in this house than I should. Sometimes I feel like I’m going in circles and going no where fast. I haven’t done anything to my hair in 3 days. Needless to say, I currently only wear makeup once a week, on a good week. I see zero point of wearing my contacts, unless I’m heading out for a special occasion or event. My current work-from-home attire is usually pajamas for the first half of the day, before making the big transition to an oversized t-shirt and yoga pants.

I am a full-time mommy, and a full-time quality specialist in a legal realm. I work both jobs, at the same time. I also am one of those women who take on multiple side gigs. Lately, I’ve realized I need to get my priorities in check, as my plate is starting to cave in.

BUT….how do you prioritize when everything seems like a priority? Do you hear me, sister?

Right now, I’m looking at the dog hair on the floor that needs swept up, because I’ve been too busy to run the shark. Yes, too busy to run our self-operating shark. I mean, after all, you need to pick all of your cords and junk up off the floor, first. And frankly, I haven’t found the 5 minutes to do it. I could be doing that right now instead of writing this blog, but then, maybe my whole purpose would be defeated. Last night, I loaded what I could into the dishwasher. Still, the sink is full of dishes that need hand-washed. I turned a blind eye last night, because Clara needed me more.

…..She’s growing up before my eyes, and I don’t want to miss these once-in-a-lifetime moments. Every little step she takes (both literally and metaphorically) amazes me. I’m still awestruck that I get to be her mommy. She is everything I dreamed of, and so much more.

Soon, I will be starting my work day. I like to have that first hour or so to myself before Clara gets up. The disadvantage of that? If I let her sleep too long into the morning, she will then subsequently decide we should have a play-a-thon at midnight. Then, if we are sitting in the recliner together, I risk falling asleep before her……which results in a risk of broken glasses and pulled out hair. (At least I awake to that little 8 tooth smile). Still, I like that hour or two of serenity I get in the morning. Now, to weigh the pros and cons. It’s a balance. A true balance.

Right before she gets up (or I wake her up), I get her scrambled eggs going. I’ve been making myself eat an egg or two with her each morning, which is a big achievement for me. She takes a LONG time to eat those eggs. The pediatrician says she is at a self-feeding age. But, would you like a strong dose of honesty? I don’t have time to give her 3 showers a day, so I still do a lot of her feeding for her. (You know, the old-fashioned way where mommy holds the spoon). And have you seen her head of hair? I don’t think ANYONE who has a daughter with as much hair as mine would advise self-feeding. (Unless of course THEIR toddler LOVES the washing out shampoo process). Oh, and no, I cannot just pull her hair back these days. Let me stop you there. She now takes it down as soon as I pull it up. Remember “Cousin It?” Enough said.

(But when I push her hair out of her face, I can still see this sweet little smile).

Okay, okay. So, I let her self-feed here and there. When it comes to her morning eggs though? I will continue to be the feeder. I have work to do. When I place her in the pack n’ play to watch Veggie Tales….I’d rather her eggs only be in her belly, rather than all over her play station. I guess maybe that makes me a bit of a “control freak.” I also guess that according to the “American Association of Pediatrics,” that may make me some sort of a parenting failure. I guess I was also supposed to start her on solid foods before 12 months as well, but I insist (not to their face of course), that I know my tot better than they do. I knew my sensitive girl (who overcame a pretty intense milk protein sensitivity) was too much of a choker and a gagger for anything besides puree before 12 months. I’m probably overprotective, but I won’t apologize for it either. My motto is “better safe than sorry.” So, here we are: She loves her eggs, fruits and veggies, but she also loves Chick Fil-A, Italian and Mexican foods. A girl after my own heart…

(In this birthday picture, she was most definitely not a fan of self-feeding. Leave it to my child to not want to participate in the smash cake era).

Anyways….as she she slowly takes each and every little bite on those work mornings…..I sit by my laptop and make sure I don’t have any urgent assignments or e-mails coming in. If I need to reply to an e-mail or research a case, I flip around my chair and do so. In between, my neat little eater looks at me as if to say, “I’m waiting.”

That’s the thing. Sometimes I feel like everyone is waiting on me for something. What few know is I’ve been “waiting on me” for a good year now. I’ve been waiting to feel really good and sort of like me again.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I like this new mommy version of me, but I haven’t exactly liked the physical changes that have come with it. No, I’m not trying to lose weight. Truthfully, “body image” is kind of the last thing on my mind right now. I’m currently trying to NOT lose any more weight than I already unintentionally did.

Let’s just say, I didn’t feel well for the longest span of time I’ve ever experienced this past year. Now, not to worry. My diagnosis is not life-threatening, but some days it can be a bit life-altering. Though they say it’s chronic, I feel myself getting better every day. With an altered diet, the proper supplements and a ton of electrolytes, I am believing for God’s full healing. I believe his promises are for ME and for YOU. As the woman who grabbed the hem of Jesus’ garment and received healing, I am doing the same. I truly believe my persistence will pay off. This hasn’t been an easy ride alongside being a new mom, but little by little…..I’m getting there.

I can see some of you rolling your eyes. I only have one child. I know, I know. Some of you are balancing 2, 3, 4, 5 and more. Your hair and makeup look fabulous, as do your high heels. (I recently donated most of mine). Your home looks like it belongs on Pinterest. While mine has infinite potential, my decorating skills just don’t measure up. I think you’re a superhero.

Now, I can honestly say I DO cook most of our meals at home, but don’t expect every single one of them to be super healthy every single night. Though the husband is easy-going, he really likes hearty dinners. Sometimes mama needs to pop in that frozen lasagna, and sometimes she really just wants a Chick Fil-A night. (Yes, this is the second time I’ve brought up Chick Fil-A). It’s all about balance and moderation, right?

And then, I’ve changed “socially.” As a child, I was super shy. Then, I became the super outgoing adult for a good decade of my life. Now? I’m still outgoing, but I’ve realized how introverted I really am. Most of the time, I feel as if I’d rather be home……yet feel like I shouldn’t rather be home. Does that make any sense?

Maybe I am an example of what happens when you become a mom in your mid-30’s and try to balance #momlife with your full-time work. Or maybe, this is just who I am.

With that said, saying “no” is not one of my greatest strengths. It’s a weak area for me. While I’ve improved over the years, it’s still a struggle. All in one breath I say “no” to my daughter, and then give in a second later. (Have you seen her face)? Just wondering.

“No, we cannot read right now. I need you to spend a few minutes in your pack n’ play while I get some work done.”

And then the tears start.

And then I pick her up. How can I not? There’s something about watching those little hands “pat the bunny,” pull back the lift-a-flaps, and turn each page one by one. So, the house must wait. After all, story time with her is a huge highlight for me. If it brings both of us joy…..why not?

Maybe I have a long list of improvements I need to make. Maybe I need to find that balance you’re supposed to have when you’re a working mom and wife. But maybe, there isn’t such a thing as a balance. Maybe “balance” is nothing more than a human-created opinion.

Just maybe, I’m actually doing pretty great….

My daughter smiles a lot and steadily gains weight. From 5 1/2 pounds to 22, I like to think I’m doing something right. In fact, sometimes she can (and does) eat more than me. She laughs when I play peek-a-boo and act like a total goof, and as just mentioned, cherishes our story time. She enjoys her baths so much that she cries about getting out. She likes my singing (she’s my only fan). She always has clean clothes to wear, and she seems to like my cooking. Best of all? She already dances to praise and worship music.

My husband seems pretty dang content as well…..along with our dog who has been with me for 5 years now.

I was also very pleased with my recent workplace evaluation. I give God all the glory.

Meanwhile, I still manage to keep up with my family and friends. I even manage to make it to events and ministry assignments, whenever I can.

No matter how I feel in the mornings, I get up and log-in for work (and until March, I was getting up and driving to the office each day). Maybe I’m in pajamas and sporting a messy bun these days, but does anyone really care just as long as you’re successfully serving those you’re being paid to serve? Does it really matter if my floors currently need swept, and I have a few dishes in the sink? Or does it matter most that those who are in my home are healthy and happy?

And sometimes life is hard….really hard. Sometimes you just can’t have it all, all the time. And maybe we aren’t supposed to. Maybe that’s where faith comes in. Maybe this is how we really recognize our need for Jesus: When we allow him to be our strength….and when we give our shortfalls to Him.

As 2 Corinthians 12:10 says, “That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Maybe my multi-tasking is working out pretty well after all. Maybe just maybe….I’m exactly right where I need to be, doing exactly what I need to do, and being exactly who God wants me to be.

And maybe just maybe….I’m speaking to you too, Mommy.

Favorite Earning & Saving Apps for Frugal Folks

hollymarietong Budgeting, Encouragement, frugal living, Personal Growth September 29, 2020September 30, 2020amazon, best iphone apps, budgeting, budgeting advice, budgeting tips, budgets, checkout51, coinout, coupons, drop app, ebates, fetch rewards, finances, financial advice, financial apps, financial planning, financial tips, frugal, frugal living, gift cards, ibotta, kroger, paypal, rakuten, receipt hog, saving money, savings advice, savings apps, savings tips, savingstar, sephora, shopkicks, walmart 0 Comment

When it comes to savings apps, coupons and bargain hunting, I could go on and on for days. It’s been both a necessity and a passion in my life. I live in Nashville, which is quickly becoming among the most expensive places to live. Therefore, it is simply silly and impractical to not save money when I very well know that I can. However, prior to the rising cost of living, I was always a saver. It never will matter if I’m rich or poor. I will always use my coupons, apps and savings opportunities, because why not? My mom taught me how to be a saver from an early age. I honestly believe my mom’s early teaching has made me a more thankful person in the long run.

I have always enjoyed looking at my savings on any given trip, and always vow that some year I’m going to keep track of my total savings, because it has to be thousands of dollars. However, this kind of record-keeping requires A LOT of dedication.

Still, whether it has been shopping for clothing, planning my wedding, or looking to redecorate my home, I have always been dedicated to being thrifty and frugal…..(even if it takes me a little bit of extra time). I will never be the girl to just drop $50 on a shirt, nor will I ever be the one to pay regular price on anything when it isn’t necessary. If it’s already only $7.99 at Ross or $8.99 at Marshall’s, I can certainly pay regular price then. In that case, I’m at a discount store to begin with. I just cannot justify paying for one shirt what I very well know I can get four shirts for. Catch my drift?

I often get asked about my savings: What I do, and how I do it?

Whether or not I’m asked, I always enjoy sharing my tips with anyone and everyone. My endless tips and tricks would be best spread out over a series of posts. However, today, I am just going to educate my frugal friends on the savings apps I’ve been using. Have a smart phone? GREAT! Do you save receipts? PERFECT! Put them to great use! Even if it’s a gas station receipt for a pack of gum, tell the cashier you want your receipt when he/she asks.

Now……download the following FREE apps for opportunities to earn cash back, e-gift cards and free items.

Ibotta: This is probably among the most popular of savings apps, so I’m going to go ahead and assume that many of my readers probably already know about this one. However, I meet people all the time who haven’t yet discovered it. In fact, I didn’t sign up with Ibotta until 2 years ago, though I’m pretty sure I had heard about it prior to then. I don’t think I realized how easy or beneficial it was until I really gave it a chance. (To date, I have earned $482.48 in cash back in 2 short years on this app alone).

How to use: Basically, on this app, you search for offers that are available at different stores you shop at or plan to shop at. Some of my main stores would be Kroger, Wal-Mart, Publix, Walgreens, Target and Amazon, for example. They also feature other random stops like certain gas stations and even the Dollar Tree. You simply click on the + signs of the items you may be interested in purchasing at each store.

Then, you go shopping and actually buy the participating items. (REMEMBER to get your receipt….and do not lose it! This will not work without your receipt).

Next, you will want to redeem your offers once you get home. Now, let me first say: If you used Ibotta for Wal-Mart, this next step is going to be extra easy, as long as you have hit the + symbol on all your items. With Wal-Mart, all you have to do is generally scan the little square box at the bottom of your receipt, and it will almost ALWAYS automatically detect all participating items you added to your list.

Kroger and most other stores though? You will likely have to scan the UPC on each product. I tried linking my Kroger card to the app, but for whatever reason had issues. Maybe you will have more luck than I did.

There are many opportunities items in which you can purchase the same item multiple times and get cash back for each one – you simply put in the quantity (but Wal-Mart even detects your quantity). Some items, they will require you buy 2 or more to get cash back, so make sure you look closely.

I have come to find that Wal-Mart is the most user-friendly with Ibotta and offers the most, though I’m not a big Wal-Mart shopper. I use it at multiple retailers, though I am a pretty devoted Kroger shopper.

What’s more? You can also get this cash back in addition to the sales and your usual coupons.

For example, let’s just say I purchased the limit of 5 Fage yogurts for .50 cents back on each. I will scan my receipt, scan each label and put the quantity (if I’m at Kroger). I will earn a total of $2.50 back in cash for this purchase alone. Let’s just say the Fage yogurt was also on sale, and I had a coupon for a free one. Well, I am barely going to have paid anything for the yogurt when it’s said and done. I have even had situations where I was nearly PAID to buy an item, thanks to Ibotta, my other apps and coupons.

There is also a “pay with Ibotta” option on this app that you may want to take advantage of as well.

Redeeming your earnings: Ibotta is a cash back app, in which you can transfer your funds to Paypal when you have earned $20 back, and then directly into your account. Yes, you will need a Paypal account for cash back if you don’t already have one. Ibotta also now offers a broad array of digital gift cards if you would rather earn back in that way instead. Everything from restaurants to retail stores to airlines gift cards are an option: Whatever your heart desires!

Tips: I always tell new Ibotta users to never buy things they wouldn’t normally buy unless it’s something they really want to try. Also, keep brand names in mind. Maybe you can save $0.35 back on Ibotta, but maybe the generic item is still cheaper. Just stick with the generic then, unless of course you much prefer the brand of that particular item. Make sense? Another tip? Always check the “any” section even if you’re just going into the store to buy one generic brand. Sometimes they will offer $0.10 back on any brand of bread, any brand of chicken breast, etc. Some grocery trips you may only earn back $0.10 cents or nothing at all, but it’s all about shopping smart (and not buying things just because they are on there). If you start buying items just because they are on Ibotta, your intention to save might end up turning into increased spending. If you don’t much time to browse Ibotta, always check the “any,” “new offers,” and the “what’s hot” categories at the least.

Some months will be better than others on Ibotta. I have those months I earn $40 back, while other months it may look more like $4. It all depends on if they are featuring the items I tend to buy or not. Their cash back opportunities change constantly, so check often.

Other ways to earn cash on Ibotta: Ibotta also has a great referral program, which also gets your cash back stacking up even quicker. The referral incentives change all the time, but there are always opportunities to earn cash if your friends use your code to sign up for their account. It may be $5, or it may be more. If you feel inclined to help my earnings AND yours, here is my referral code you will want to enter: udlflrln

Ibotta also features a ton of bonuses: (IE – redeem 12 offers before such and such date and receive an extra $3 back in cash). They tend to run a lot of extra cash opportunities around holidays and special occasions. Another example of a bonus could be, “Buy 2 Cottonelle products to earn an extra $1 back.” As long as you appropriately scanned the item, Ibotta will detect and credit you with your bonuses automatically.

Again, to begin earning your cash back, sign up under my code of udlflrln.

2. Shopkicks: While Ibotta has resulted in the most cash back for me, Shopkicks is a not too far distant second. I would also consider Shopkicks to be an enjoyable app. (though you somewhat have to work for it).

Description: On Shopkicks, you earn points towards various gift cards for a variety of reasons – from Outback Steakhouse to Sephora, you can enjoy gift cards all thanks to this app.

How to earn points? 1. You can earn points towards a gift card simply for walking into a store. (IE – if I am going to walk into Kroger, I turn on the app. click on the icon of the person “walking” and my phone will recognize I am in Kroger. Boom, there is 10 points. On certain days, some stores offer 100 or even 250 kicks for simply walking into a store).

You can also earn points for simply scanning items that are on each store’s featured list. My sister and I enjoy walking around stores and scanning items (especially if they’re on the way) during big grocery shopping trips. We think of it as another fun way to get exercise. For instance, after you’ve earned 10 points for simply walking into Kroger, your scans section might also show that you can earn 40 points for simply scanning a bag of Seattle’s Best Coffee or 75 points for scanning a pack of Quilted Northern toilet paper.

3. Another huge way to earn points on shopkick is to actually buy some of their featured items. Any item you scan probably also offers points back if you purchase that item. For instance, I might scan the Quilted Northern toilet paper that is already featured in their sale that week, use a coupon for it, scan it for points on Shopkicks….AND then be able to take a picture of my receipt for an additional 250 points simply because I purchased the item. I may even find that Ibotta offers cash back on the same item! Another way to earn points is by linking your card to certain stores and earning points for each dollar spent (I don’t really do this one). Lastly, you can even earn points simply by going to their “discover” section and watching little random advertising videos…..because, why not?

Redeeming your points: On Shopkicks, you choose the gift card you want to work towards (and you can change it at any time): 1,250 kicks = $5 gift card, 2,500 kicks = $10, 6,250 kicks = $25 and 12,500 kicks = $50. You can set your goal as low or as high as you like for whatever you are wanting. If you just want $5 to Starbucks, great – it won’t take you long at all. If you want $50 to Lowe’s, great again! Just be willing to work for it a little bit (but it’s fun work).

On Shopkicks in just 2 years, I have earned a total of 11 gift cards (technically 12, if I’d like to to cash in my current points for $5). I particularly enjoy redeeming their Sephora gift cards, because it’s a way to get cool makeup I am normally too cheap to buy. When I come home with Sephora bags, I can brag to my husband that Shopkicks funded my trip. All gift cards are received electronically. (Be prepared to manually punch in the gift card numbers at the store).

Tips: Again, do not trick yourself into buying items you wouldn’t normally buy just to earn points. The key is to save money – not to spend more or to do anything counterproductive. Sometimes your app. will even recognize you are in a parking lot and award you points without ever even walking into the store. However, this is usually only true of 10 pointers. If Marshall’s is offering you 250 points to walk inside, you probably need to walk inside. Unfortunately, sometimes this app. can be a bit glitchy for walk-ins. They give you an opportunity to report the error, but I’m not convinced it always works.

With all of that said, Shopkicks also has a super cool referral program. If you sign up under me and simply walk into a store, scan or buy something on the app within 7 days, we will both earn 250 kicks! My code is MALL366184.

3. Fetch Rewards: I feel like this app is a bit underrated. I have already earned 8 gift cards on this one in a little over a year, but this is one may take a little longer to stack up for you, depending on where you shop and how you shop. I also have at times decided I wanted to redeem an Amazon gift card at just $3 of earnings. This app particularly loves certain brand names, but if you buy all generics, this does not at all mean that you won’t be able to earn gift cards. You just may average 25 points on a receipt vs. 1,000.

Description: The main thing you need to do on this app. is to scan your grocery and gas station receipts for a minimum of 25 points each. Recently, Fetch has even started giving 5 points for restaurant receipts, along with other non-grocer stores. If you buy any of their “featured items,” you will earn back more points than the standard 5 or 25. For instance, if you follow the directions on these diapers pictured above, you can earn thousands of points from your receipt. Now, it’s important to note: There ARE times you may have to hit “correct my receipt,” and give a little more information. I have had those times that Fetch didn’t detect a featured item on my receipt. However, when I notify them, they always take care of it. It tends to pick up on my smaller earnings, but my bigger ones, I sometimes have to let them know their app. didn’t give me credit. Can that be a pain? Yes, but again, I’m working towards those gift cards.

What’s great about this app. is the double earnings you can get back from it. Let’s just say that you purchased the Dove body wash off of their special offers for a total of 1,000 points – it just may be that Kroger had it on sale for $4.99 that week, plus offered a $1 off digital coupon, PLUS Ibotta offered $0.75 back, PLUS shopkicks gave you 25 points for scanning and 250 for buying it. Yes, sometimes you can really luck out just like that!

I have really lucked out at times….and I LOVE it. Similar to Shopkicks, yet of course different, points add up to gift card redemptions on this app (1,000 points = $1………3,000 points = $3…….$5 points = $5 all the way to 50,000 points = $50.00). Again, you can cash in your points whenever you want for yet another electronic gift card.

Tips: I prefer to use these electronic gift cards on online purchases, as this one can be a pain to use in a store. While Sephora never seems confused by my Shopkick redemptions, I feel like this lesser known app can confuse some cashiers. Maybe it is just my luck, but I prefer to redeem on this app. for online purchases with Target, Amazon or something like that. I guess nowadays you can shop at any of these places online. I don’t want to discourage you against using this at any restaurants or stores, as it may be just fine for you. I just wanted to make you aware, not everyone will know about this app.

Again, this app. offers a super cool referral program. If you use my code, we will both get 2,000 points when you scan your first receipt. My code is T8BWA.

Cool side note: This app. literally tracks your spending for the year at each store. It compares month-to-month and year to year. This COULD be a helpful budgeting/record-keeping tool if you’d like it to be. Just click on “activity” to see all of the details.

4. Receipt Hog: So, I’m going to tell you from the get-go, this app is my slowest for earnings. A lot of impatient people may not stick around on it long – yet I stay, because why not? I do earn money back and it accepts nearly EVERY SINGLE receipt no matter where it is from. On this app, you also earn “points” AKA “coins” for either a Visa or Amazon gift card, or you can earn money that can be sent to your Paypal account.

Description: Basically you just simply scan your receipt. It doesn’t matter if it’s a fast food restaurant, a clothing store or a gas station, receipt hog is happy to accept and happy to give you something……even if not very much. The higher the grocery bill, the more coins you will get. They accept more receipts than most apps. While this app is slow to stack, it is entertaining to me. First of all, it features a cute little pig that appears in different costumes for different times of the year….AND a super fun slot machine where you do have a chance to strike it “big.” That possibility of my receipt being drawn (it has happened before) always keeps me coming back and submitting receipts.

So let’s break this down: If you shop at a pet store, you will get both “coins” and a sweepstake entry for simply scanning your receipt. For instance, when I buy my dog’s food at PetSmart, and I will get awarded around 15 coins and a sweepstakes entry for doing so. If you go to a clothing or electronic store, you get to play their slot machine! This part is so fun, and makes this among the most entertaining of the savings apps (at least for me). Though many times, your slot is unsuccessful or your awards are not much more than 2, 5 or 10 coins, it is still something and still fun. It’s not like it’s some big time waster. Big winners can earn a TON of coins, and even $100 (though I’ve never been that person just yet) – there are winners all the time. In general, you will either get coins and/or a sweepstakes entry for almost anything. The more entries you have, the bigger your chances of course. Like I said, this isn’t a huge earnings app. most of the time, but fun, and super easy. It literally takes 2 seconds to scan your receipt.

Tips: If you go to the rewards section, sometimes they will also feature surveys you can take for additional coins. You can also get additional points for connecting your Amazon or e-mail to this account.

This app. does not offer a referral program, but again, too fun to pass up!

5. Drop: This app. is yet another fascination of mine, thanks to my little sister (my fellow saver). We are carbon copies of one another when it comes to savings (and we are not making any apologies for it either). Because I joined this app, we both received 5,000 points from the get-go, which is equivalent to $5 for both of us.

Description: There really isn’t a ton to say about this one, because once you set up your account, you do little to NO work (unless of course you want to put in a little). This app. can be as little or as much as you’d like to make of it. Now, things have changed with this app. since I first downloaded on it. I don’t want to tell you wrong, but I cannot see everything without setting up a new account. I also cannot find the specifics online. However, I believe the new process goes like this: You simply link your card to this app and choose 2 retailers or restaurants that you’d like to earn points at. (1,000 points = $1, just like on Fetch). As long as you use your card to make purchases at these businesses, it does the work for you. If you don’t want to do much more than that, you are still on your way to earning some good points.

You will want to choose 2 of the places on their list that you are likely to spend the most money at. You can browse their offers to start earning points as well, but at the very least, any time you buy something at one of those 2 places and use your card, you will automatically get points towards a gift card. (IE – if you choose Starbucks as one of your choices and then go order a coffee, you will automatically be awarded points when you use your card there. You don’t need to scan anything. It may take a few days to see your points in your account, but rest assured, they should arrive). You don’t have to do anything, except swipe the linked card. Now, there are also a TON of offers (outside of the 2 businesses you choose) available, if you’d like to advantage of them. If you shop through the app. at Wal-Mart for example, there just may be a current opportunity to earn 60 points back per $1 spent. Click on the “Shop” tab to see what the current offers are.

Other ways to earn points: They also feature a fun game called, “supercharge,” where you can earn additional points. The icon is a snake, so you have to stay on the lookout for it. It stays locked until you earn points shopping. You also get to play “hoops,” among other little fun games. As I’m writing this, I literally just stopped for a game of hoops. You get one free play a day. I earn around 50 points each time I play. This app. kind of has a Receipt Hog vibe to it. It can be entertaining for sure. They also offer a ton of surveys for points if you feel comfortable answering the questions on there.

Though it has taken me a little while to stack up, it’s such a low-maintenance app. As you can see, I have almost $32 stacked up from very minimal effort.

As mentioned, this also contains a great referral program. If you use my code, we will both earn $5: 1fcto

Tips: While I will admit I haven’t had the energy to learn EVERYTHING on this app, I would encourage you to study it. There is A LOT on there. While I am not the master of this app., I do want to encourage you to really think it through on which of the businesses choices you are likely to spend the most money at BEFORE you choose them. Apparently, you cannot change them once you select them, so choose wisely. Looking back, I wish I would’ve known this. Still, I cannot complain about this little gem of an app!

6. Coinout: This one is so very easy.

Description: It is a concept that is pretty similar to Fetch, though it awards cents back to you rather than “points.” It may take a minute for your earnings to stack up, as you typically earn anywhere from $0.1 – $0.3 cents back on each receipt, but I’ve earned up to $0.13 back on some. I don’t think they’ve ever rejected a single receipt of mine. All I’ve been doing is scanning receipts, so I cannot complain. However, there are A LOT of other opportunities on there which I’m not taking advantage of. I will admit, I need to do some more exploring beyond scanning my receipts. They feature a great deal of businesses who offer cash back. They even offer cash back on certain groceries. Whether you’re purchasing in store or online, you can earn cash back. I encourage you to check deeper into this app.

Tips: As I said, study this app. I think you will be impressed enough. Also, take clear pictures. Beware: They inform you that if you send a duplicate receipt, you will lose your account – so be sure to never accidently scan a receipt twice (happens to the best of us). Lastly, realize your gift card or earnings do not happen automatically. You will need to wait a few business days (up to 10) for them to approve it.

Note: I recently earned a $10 Amazon gift card on there and am well on my way to receiving another gift card. However, I am seeing now it takes a minimum of $20 to transfer your earnings to Paypal.

Again, they have a cool little referral program. Their incentives change, so though I cannot tell you what you will earn, it will be something: My link: https://coinout.com/referrals/new?r=Z76F2ND

7. SavingStar: Yet another way to earn cash by simply buying groceries you may normally buy.

Description: I think of this one as a much smaller, slower stacking up Ibotta, minus the bonuses. Yet, I still see them as worth it, as I did earn $20 on there in a fairly short time due to some bulk diaper buying. One way they do differ from Ibotta is that they have a lot more offers that are a bulk requirement. For example, at this moment, if you buy $25 worth of Kellogg’s cereal, you can earn $5 back. You can buy this cereal in one trip or many.

Tips: You will want to be aware that if you are working towards a bulk rebate that you must complete it before the expiration dates on there. If not, you will lose what you worked toward, which has happened to me before. This does make this app. a harder one in some ways. However, earning the $15 back in diapers I did that one time really did make it stack up quickly. Also, they do have here and there $1 – $3 back offers on single items. All in all, I do not consider this a high maintenance app. While it’s probably not going to become my biggest earner, I do check this one before I go to the store. Though I haven’t explored it, they are now also partnered with coupons.com, which may interest some of you. So yeah, I see this app. as worth having.

Referral program? Not that I know of, but maybe I’m missing something, or maybe that will change.

How to redeem: Once you’ve earned a total of $20 back, you can redeem and send to Paypal.

Other apps worth mentioning: I’m not as well-versed in this one, but I do think you should know about it: Rakuten (formerly known as Ebates). I have this one downloaded on my phone, and know it’s been around a long time. I understand the concept of it, and know people earn back a lot on here. The main reason I haven’t gotten too much into it is because I can do a lot of what I’d do on there on Ibotta or another app. It just feels easiest to let my points build on another app. that I more frequently use. Still, I do keep this one, and have heard others say many great things about it. I’m definitely not counting it out, as it is certainly legitimate and credible. Maybe I’m just already balancing too much? (Imagine that).

I also should mention Checkout51 (which is basically the same concept as Ibotta). However, Checkout51 doesn’t offer anything close to what Ibotta does in terms of variety, last time I looked. They also tend to “run out” of offers. I decided I didn’t really want to mess with this one any longer and deleted it. However, you may want to check it out. Maybe it has improved? Maybe I should look again. I also have Receipt Pal on my phone. There are some ongoing issues going on with confirming my e-mail, but I do know you can scan receipts and earn points, which turn into cash. I suggest looking into that one as well.

Now, with all of that said, I have earned back almost $800 between all of these apps. in 2 years. Some of my earnings ended up being straight cash back that I transferred to Paypal, and then to my bank account. Other times, I earned a gift card.

Either way, THIS money has helped in a variety of ways: I’ve bought little things off Amazon I wanted. My app earnings even once funded a nice anniversary dinner, among many other little luxuries. Sometimes I just decide our bank account could use a little boost before pay day, so I’ll transfer $20-$40 over from Ibotta at that time. For the longest time, I got pretty much ALL of my makeup from Sephora for free simply because of my Shopkick app.

Maybe you want these apps to be your excuse for purchasing Starbucks coffee. After all, your husband cannot complain if it was free, right? The possibilities are endless, and I suppose we can all be motivated by something different.

Now, Ibotta is my winner in terms of what I’ve earned back. It has given me half of all of my earnings out of all of these apps. So, if you can only choose ONE, I suggest Ibotta. However, every single app I have given you is worth the time, in my opinion. If it’s simply scanning a receipt, why not? And on Drop, you don’t even have to do anything except link your card for at least TWO companies to earn some points over time. Yes, apps like Receipt Hog take awhile to stack up, but oh well. If you don’t put much work into it, what’s the harm? Just a couple months ago, I got my first reward on Receipt Hog. Yes, it took a long time to build that cash, so I decided to get something fun and meaningful with it: I bought my mom, sister and self an essential oil/stress relief bracelet off of Amazon. I also got Clara a personalized card book for her 1st birthday, as a special keepsake she can always have. Every single one of us are enjoying our fun little Receipt Hog reward.

The bottom line: For a majority of these apps, it only takes a second to scan the receipt. I have a system. I take each receipt and do what I can with it on each app…..and then I move on to the next receipt.

Whew okay…..I got descriptive on all of this, but I know how overwhelming all of this can feel at first. It takes a minute to really learn all these apps, and I still cannot say I’m all of the way there. Do not get overwhelmed by this blog post, simply because of all of the words. Yes, I went into great detail, BUT none of these apps are overly complicated to get started on. I just wanted to give you all the ins and outs, tips and my personal observations so that you can have the best experience possible on each of them.

So really….I just wanted to write the type of blog that I tend to find useful in my own life. There are also a lot of great YouTube videos out there that also explain these apps in great detail, if you are more of a video person.

Final Confession: Yes. Sometimes I feel like I’m juggling apps while walking into a store, yes. Sometimes I’m looking at deals on Ibotta, while my sister is handing me an item to scan for Shopkicks….and sometimes I’m trying to remember if the item I’m hoping to get cash back for on Ibotta is also featured for points on Fetch. Sometimes I forget to scan a receipt. Sometimes I get a little frazzled. Sometimes I am also trying to look at my Kroger digital coupons and my paper ones at the same time, but guess what friends? It is totally doable…..and super fun! I will admit I have been slacking on Shopkicks during all of this COVID chaos, but I still love it! I can still make it out of a huge grocery trip in about an hour. I can do most of my app work in the comfort of my own home.

I also know that I didn’t even come close to listing all of the savings apps out there – these are just my go-to’s. I know I’m late to the party with Ebates, among others….and would love to hear some of your favorites too! (please share them in the comment section below). I never get tired of learning about new ways to save!

If you enjoyed this post, please let me know that as well. As I said, this is only scratching the surface on my savings. I am totally open to doing more savings posts in the future! This isn’t even counting my coupons and other savings avenues. The future post possibilities are endless!

Sound off below if these savings posts are something you would like to see more of!

Until then…Happy Savings, friends!

5 Steps to Striving for Selflessness in a Self-Absorbed Society

hollymarietong Budgeting, dating, design, Encouragement, frugal living, Nashville Music, Personal Growth, single life, weddings, Women in Music July 29, 2020July 29, 2020advice, authenticity, beneficial, bloggers, care, caring, diy, encouragement, friendly, helpful, interior design, legacy, love, loving, pop culture, positivity, recipes, self-absorbed, selflessness 2 Comments

When I created this blog, I vowed to share selfless content that would be beneficial to all in some way, shape or form. Have I fallen short at times? YES. Have I probably shared some useless facts about me that didn’t really inspire or encourage anyone? I have no doubt. Have I wasted my time and someone else’s once or twice with a post that lacked substance? Sigh. I’m sure I have. (Sorry!)

So here’s the deal: In 2020, everyone and their sister, is now a lifestyle blogger or YouTube star. Sharing makeup, fashion advice and the latest Target finds are about as 2020 as COVID-19 and face masks. I’m certainly not knocking this line of work, as obviously, *I* am one of them. No, I’m not a YouTube star, with a big following (so don’t look me up). However, I’m “somewhat” in the lifestyle blogging world on a minor level. I’m a wife, mom, full-time legal assistant, and publicist. After that? I post on here if I’m able, though I’m dying to make it more of a priority. But first, I don’t want to waste anyone’s time.

Please understand: I didn’t create a blog to be trendy, or as an excuse to quit my day job. I didn’t create a blog so we could just talk about outer appearance, though there is certainly nothing wrong with wanting to look your best. My goal has been to focus more on character, legacy, faith and eternity, while still enjoying the here and now. To enjoy the here and now, we need to love our homes, which means practical living tips are also of course a huge plus.

Writing is my passion – it isn’t some new thing for me. Writing to me is like breathing. I don’t do it in the hopes that I can be cool or popular. I do it, because I don’t know how not to. Therefore, I am always seeking God’s help, and looking for the best outlets to not just hone my craft – but to most importantly, inspire others. But tell me: How can I do that?

I recently read a post on in a Facebook “girl’s group” I’m in. It really, really, got me thinking. Really.

Someone asked the group, if they subscribe to bloggers and/or what kind of blogs they enjoy. A lot of the respondents had a similar response/view of bloggers. The discussion left me feeling a weird combo of motivation and defeat (if that’s even possible):

This short little “survey” revealed that a lot of our non-blogging female peers consider most bloggers to be self-absorbed. They aren’t interested in reading about “her life.” Though this wasn’t their exact words, I picked up on what they were saying. In a nutshell, they are basically interested in reading about “their life.” They want to read blogs that benefit them, not just the blogger: They want to hear about DIY home cleaning recipes, and how to make their Grandma’s easy homemade marinara sauce. The majority isn’t really all that interested in seeing what is in Ellie’s makeup bag, or viewing an outfit that they cannot afford. They don’t care about HER vacation or HER wedding, that they cannot afford. However, they may find her discount/money-saving tips valuable. They may benefit from some of her DIY tips in general, whether that be household cleaners, makeup, baking, wedding planning or vacationing. They just want to know that it isn’t all about Ellie. They want to know “what’s in it for them.”

Basically, what readers want is authenticity and selflessness. They want practical tips they can do on their own. They want affordable, and they want fairly simple. They don’t want to read 2,000 words, or read a huge backstory on a recipe. They are mainly looking for the ingredients, what to set their oven at, and the baking time.

I grasped these truths a LONG time ago and vowed to be different, yet I still find myself wondering EXACTLY what my readers are most interested in. I also find myself struggling to not be overly wordy while I’m at it. Some of my blog posts have been well on their way to becoming a book, so I’m guilty.

Here’s a startling confession though: I had zero problems getting millions of views on my pop culture column I used to run. But when I make a blog about faith, character and legacy, with some practical living tips mixed in? It’s much harder. No, it’s not about views. If it becomes about “views” then it becomes about the self-absorbed issue I’m talking about. Still, how can I REALLY reach people with the kind of beneficial content that matters? To me, pop culture isn’t the way to do that.

With that said, I want to do better going forward, and I need YOUR help. YES you.

I don’t want this blog to just be about Holly. Holly is just the messenger. I want to KNOW WHAT IT IS THAT YOU WANT TO KNOW! I want you to sound off in the comment section below.

LET ME KNOW: Are you enjoying the Interior Design posts? What practical tips would you like to know about Interior Design? With most of us being home more often, I feel like now is the time for more “home” posts. I don’t believe there has been any time more important than now to love the space we call “home.” Tell me if I’m wrong.

Would you like to see more easy recipe posts? Frugal living tips? More DIY organization posts? DIY cleaners? More faith and encouragement posts? All of the above? What else? What benefits YOU? What would make YOU want to subscribe to a blog?

And because I want to leave YOU with something beneficial today…………Here are 5 steps to being selfless in a self-absorbed world:

Ask people how they are, and TRULY wait to hear the answer. Don’t just ask, “how are you?,” and walk on. Doing so, shows routine and obligation….not care and sincerity. Wait until they actually tell you how they are and respond to them. Go a step further, and listen to what’s going on in their life, without feeling the need to immediately interject what is going on in yours.
Be a person of your word: If you say you’re going to do something….do it. Man, oh man. God has really convicted me about this one over the years. Admittedly, I’m a bit of a procrastinator. I don’t “lie” to people, or break my word on purpose. But if I tell someone we will get together soon, I want to mean it and follow through. Even if my life gets busy, I want to keep my word. If I tell someone I’m going to help them with something or make them a handmade gift….I don’t want the weeks to fly by. I want to be an “over deliverer.” When I look around, I think a lot of us get into a lazy mindset. And dang it. I’m one of them, sometimes! My Pastor has taught me SO MUCH about this topic over the years….but he hasn’t just taught it. He LIVES it, even though thousands of people attend our church. He ALWAYS follows through. He remembers what he tells people and does it. If he can do it, so can we! With that said, this tidbit, just reminded me I need to RSVP to a friend’s shower for an invite I received a couple weeks ago. This is what I’m talking about, friends! (Points at self). Don’t be the person not to RSVP, because then, you just keep the host guessing on how much food and seating they need. What’s even worse? RSVP’ing with a “yes,” only to be a no-show. What’s also bad? To not RSVP, and then to show up when they weren’t expecting you. What else? Don’t be the person to walk out of someone’s wedding reception before the food is served, when you KNOW the bride’s parents already paid for your plate. They paid for your spot, because they wanted YOU to have it. They could’ve chosen someone else. Unless you have an emergency or something pretty major come up, it’s rude and disrespectful to just leave. Everyone understands that unforeseen things come up….. but catch my drift? (Again, I know I’ve been a hypocrite in the past on some of these concepts (such as RSVP), but I’m learning. I’m trying).
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Do something nice for someone without ANY motive. There doesn’t always have to be a payment from the other party, a barter, or a “deal worked out.” What if every now and then we went out of our way and did something nice for someone, “just because?” I’m going to go ahead and say, I think this one may be one of my strengths. I feel like I do this one a lot. In fact, sometimes I feel like I’ve taken this one a little over the top at times….but I’m sure in God’s eyes there have been times I could’ve done more, for every single time I think I may have “given too much.” At the end of the day, I’d rather give too much than too little. But guys, seriously, sometimes we really should take off our “business, money-making, hat” for a minute. Not everything has to be a huge contract with a signature on the line. Every now and then, how about just doing something nice for someone….just because we wanted to bless them? I’m not suggesting we let ourselves get “walked all over,” because we DO have bills to pay. Many of us have businesses to run and jobs to do. But still….there can be a balance. What if you randomly brought someone their favorite coffee? Wrote a letter of encouragement and sent it the old snail mail way? What if you picked someone up from the airport and decide to turn down the $20 bill they offer you?
If you have a good experience with someone’s service or business, write up a nice 5 star review for them. It only takes a couple minutes. Why not? If you yourself have a service or business, you know you would like the kind reviews too. What’s more? You could even share their page, or promote their posts on YOUR social media page. If our pages are ONLY full of selfies and/or our latest accolades, perhaps we need to reexamine. We can spare and share a spot for others sometimes too, right?
Photo by Dawn D. Totty Designs
Allow yourself to be inconvenienced every now and then. This kind of goes along with #3, but can be all its own in some ways too. My Pastor talks about this point a lot as well. He teaches us that we should walk through crowds slowly, and pay attention to the needs of those around us. Maybe the LAST thing I want to do on a Saturday night is give someone a ride 30 minutes across town, but just maybe, sometimes I should. Maybe on that 30 minute ride, I’ll be able to give them encouragement. Maybe they will get out of my car blessed and inspired. Maybe sometimes we should lighten a co-worker’s load…..just because we can. Maybe sometimes we should talk to that sweet elderly woman at the grocery for 15 minutes…..just because we can. Maybe she needs your company more than you need to get home and cook dinner. Allowing yourself to be inconvenienced every now and then is perhaps the unofficial definition of “selflessness.”
Image by Rebecca Matthews from Pixabay

So there you have it. The bottom line is, everyone is craving authenticity and selflessness. People love to see kindness without motive. Yes, the world craves “love,” as it is always said…..but without authenticity and selflessness, love isn’t genuine. It doesn’t exist. Love is easy. True selflessness requires more effort. No matter what our schedule or career path is, every day we have a chance to be an example of “selflessness.”

I’d love hear your thoughts on all of the above: Sound off in the comment section below!

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