Hi. I am Holly Marie Tong-Cokkinias.
I haven’t always lived the simple life, but I like to think I’ve always kept a simple heart. I was raised as a blue collar daughter and farmer’s granddaughter. Needless to say, I was taught the importance of hard work and the value of a dollar at a young age. Most importantly though, I was taught integrity, the value of life and the salvation of Jesus Christ. Though I embraced my simple country life, there was an undeniable restlessness for “more” in life.
In elementary school, it became clear that acting and writing were my main niches in life. I also loved music, but the good Lord never did give me the gift of voice. He’s needed me in other areas I suppose…..so I’m good with that. Besides acting and writing, I didn’t have confidence in much else to be honest……that was until I became a cheerleader at my school. Between the encouragement of my parents and my cheer coach Nancy, I discovered my true drive, dedication and hidden desires in life. Though I never could sing, I also remained obsessed with music and the song lyrics that went along with it. I was THAT teenager who was writing songs instead of class notes. I was THAT girl pretending to pay attention, and to this day, I still don’t know how I graduated as an honor student.
Long story short: Before graduating from the second smallest public school in the state, I was blessed to represent the Findlay area in the 2002 Miss Ohio Teen USA pageant, and then in the 2004 Miss Ohio USA pageant. While staying in Cincinnati, a chance meeting with my favorite country band inspired me to head a little further south. South as in Nashville, TN……450 miles away from my home.
I was barely an adult when I packed up my life and made a beeline for Music City.
I never was one to do anything “halfway.” Consequently, I pushed myself from sun up to sun down.
Though it’s now all a blur of hard work, cramming classes and minimal sleep, I graduated with a Bachelor’s of Social Work from Trevecca Nazarene University in 2007. During my short time in social work, I found myself connecting with different backgrounds, demographics and life stories. From food pantries to community outreach, my heart was moved by the people I would meet along the way. As a natural born counselor and nurturer, I found a sense of fulfillment in ministering and loving on those around me.
However, my workaholic personality persisted, and my desire to succeed at a higher level ultimately caused me to spread myself extremely thin.
While working full-time for a college and later as a legal assistant, I balanced songwriting, journalism, acting and modeling all at once.
I enjoyed some success in all areas as I found myself co-writing with some of Nashville’s finest songwriters, acting in major music videos and commercials, dancing on the CMA stage, landing TV gigs, managing a magazine, running a thriving pop culture column, winning TN State Press Awards and publishing my debut book (Chick Flicks Lie). I additionally ran my own freelance writing business offering writing and consulting services to entertainers and business professionals.
Though I had befriended many of my childhood heroes, consulted with some in the peak of their professional careers and always seemed to be in that VIP spot, I still felt an emptiness. I knew that the emptiness stemmed from not fully allowing Jesus to manifest himself in my life, but I continued to work at full speed anyways.
After many lessons learned the hard way, I would later accept that the childhood restlessness I experienced could only be filled by having a genuine relationship (not religion) with Jesus Christ. I found out the hard way that it wasn’t accomplishments, social standing, relationships, friends in high places or a larger bank account that would bring me a peace of mind at the end of the day.
Just like the fence on my childhood farm that I once leaned into to daydream, I had gone on to experience both sides of life’s fence. I often felt as if I were sitting on that fence, torn between two worlds. On one side of the fence, I was the very middle class 9-5 employee, but on the other side of the fence I was a city socialite. In my own strength, I tried to be both people. Almost daily, I would leave out early and get home super late. With me, I would carry a bag of outfit changes, as I would transition my appearance from one event or obligation to the next, all day long.
The more I tried to accomplish that next big thing, the more tired I became. I also was continually suffering setbacks, disappointments and uncertainties. I knew it was time to slow down, to reflect, and to be “all in” for Jesus. I had mostly been out of church for four years. I was desiring fellowship, but didn’t know where to find what my heart was thirsting for. I knew that I was broken and that Jesus was the only one who could fix me.
In the fall of 2009, I felt God’s strong leading to google “non-denominational churches in the Mt. Juliet area,” which was interesting considering I didn’t live in that part of town at the time. I landed on Joy Church International. I immediately felt a sense of peace and comfort from the “joyful” images and words of encouragement on their website. From one visit, it was clear that I had found my church home. I had never felt so loved or so welcomed in my life. The pastor was funny. The people were real. I knew the message I just heard was going to stick with me forever. I should also add that I walked in alone as a young single, and I never once felt lonely or out of place in there.
I immediately saw the church vision. I knew it was going to grow rapidly and have an immeasurably huge impact. I knew I should be a part of that mission. The Jesus mission. However, my stubborn nature and workaholic mindset wouldn’t die easily. Every time I attended a service and clapped for new members, I felt God’s leading to rise up and to join too.
At the beginning of 2015, I finally gave in.
Though I continue to pursue my childhood goals, I now focus first on devoting my time and talents to the Lord. I decided to “seek first his kingdom,” as the word instructs. I became a greeter and an actress/production assistant on the Acts of Joy team.
During those years of self-reflection, I FINALLY “let go.”
I let God transform, rearrange and reroute me. I knew I was supposed to allow this many years earlier, but it took years of the “same ole” for me to get fed up and to realize I couldn’t navigate my own life.
The Lord also revealed to me that I had very simply let go of the basics and that I needed to get back to them. But first, I had to let go of things….a lot of things. As part of that letting go, I even had to let go of people that had been holding me back for many years.
When I fully let go…a beautiful thing happened: I found consistency, simplicity….and peace again. I also found the one whom I would marry, though I didn’t know it for a good minute. He first came disguised as a “new co-worker.” Little did I know…he was the one who would be the perfect combination of simplicity and consistency…..while also being very driven and goal-oriented.
God knows what we need.
Today, I most definitely still believe in reaching for more and continuing to dream……but I now do so with a peace of mind and a belief that God’s perfect plan will come to fruition as long as I continue to serve him. Life is one big puzzle, but my pieces come together more and more every day.
I am now at peace with who I am and who I am not.
In addition to serving Jesus, I enjoy spending time with my husband Kyle (married on 8/19/17), our daughter Clara Anne (born 7/8/19), family, friends and our dog Rosco. I also find pleasure in the simple things more than I ever have before……even the cooking, the organizing and the cleaning. (You know……the stuff I would have found boring and mundane years back). I can even find interest in straightening up a drawer, and I REALLY love “frugal living.” I believe in focusing on our families….AND pursuing our dreams. I believe in balance and a well-rounded joyful life, which is why I created this blog.
(Below are some pictures of my family):
Now, even outside of my blog, I do remain active in the “writing world.” I am still a journalist and a publicist. (Feel free to contact me if you think there is something I can assist you with).
Additionally, my dear friend Becky invited me to join her on an exciting business adventure last year. We work full-time for a state healthcare organization, BUT together, we also run a handmade company called, https://www.sheehouseco.com. If you head on over to our website, you can see what we are all about. We believe in creating quality gifts for babies, mothers…..and ALL women! From baby clothes, to furry friends to fashionable accessories…we work hard to bring you a little bit of everything. We aren’t just a “store” though. We are on a mission, and we desire to serve Jesus Christ in all that we do. SheeHouse also shares the same vision as “Strong With Holly Marie Tong.” We believe in encouraging women and supporting one another in our God-given dreams. Stay tuned…… because there is so much more to come!
Now with all of that said, I keep my career at #3. First comes Jesus…then comes family. While I need to work each day, I better have had time to pray, time to kiss my husband, and time to hold my baby, first.
My Pastor has taught me that it’s okay to be a work in progress. It’s okay to not have everything figured out. However, he consistently reminds us that we can and should enjoy the Christian journey together. The Christian life is meant to be enjoyed….not endured. I come to you not as a perfect voice….but as a forgiven one and as a sincere one. Though you’re reading my “about me,” this blog isn’t about me. It’s ultimately about Him and it’s about you too. I’m just striving to be a messenger for Him now.
(Now, here’s some great news for you: You too can be a part of our church no matter where you live and no matter where you are in the Christian journey. You can hear (and watch) the same great life-changing messages I get to. His word, His salvation and His church is available to ALL who are simply willing to accept Him into their heart. If you visit our church website you can regularly keep up with our podcast and videocast! If you’re in the area, or will be in the future, please come and visit us on site! We would love to have you. If you’ve ever felt scared or awkward visiting a church for the first time, just know, that at ours, we welcome you right in as if you’ve always been with us).
On Strong with Holly Marie Tong, I am hopeful you will be inspired by the encouragement and the every day life applications you will find on here. There’s no better time to be a positive change agent than now. There’s no better time to step into your true purpose than now. There’s no better time to get organized and to simplify your life than now.
A life well-lived life requires strength……a strength that comes only from Him.
It’s time to rise up and be strong in the Lord:
Strong in integrity.
Strong in our homes.
Strong in our work places.
Strong in our businesses.
Strong in our parenting.
Strong in our beliefs.
Strong in our convictions.
Strong in our relationships.
Strong in our good causes.
Strong in our talents.
Strong in our callings.
Strong in our finances.
Strong in our health.
Strong in our lifestyles,
…….and strong in our every day lives……
With all that said, welcome to my blog. Make yourself at home, friends.
(Proverbs 3:5-6, Exodus 14:13-14, Jeremiah 29:11)