10 Free & Easy Ways to Improve Your Life

10 Free & Easy Ways to Improve Your Life

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Instant gratification.  It’s easy to think we can have it these days.  After all, we happen to live in a swipe right, click the mouse and order it up kind of world.  However, general life is often more of a waiting game.  When we become preoccupied with reaching a destination rather than the journey itself, we deprive ourselves of living in the moment.  We miss the lesson, and we ultimately miss the blessing.  Life’s storms have a way of raging on from time to time.  Maybe you feel like you’re trapped in a reoccuring storm, and you can’t see an end in sight.  To my knowledge, there isn’t any such thing as a storm that lasts forever.

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Sometimes there just isn’t any easy fix or clear answer to life’s trials.  Sometimes we just have to endure the storm, let it pass and learn from it.  Sometimes we just don’t have the time, the money, the people or the resources to get to where we want to be, when we want to get there.  However, it is important to remember that delays don’t mean denials.  Likewise, limitations don’t mean one needs to be hopeless. Bad days don’t make for a bad life. While life may currently be traveling at slow pace on an unknown winding road, there are free and easy ways we can improve our lives in the moment.  No, we may not get instant gratification, but we can get instant improvement:

  1. Give it to God.  Call it cliche, but I simply cannot publish a blog post about improving one’s life without making this #1 on the list.  Over and over again his word says, “do not fear.”  Over and over in my life, he’s proven himself faithful.  He wants to carry our burdens for us and give us peace in the midst of life’s storms.  His word never does promise that we’ll be without trials.  In fact, it assures us that we will face trials.  However, we are also assured that through our trials we develop perseverance and character.  The good Lord also promises to give wisdom to those who ask for it.  (James 1, 1 Peter 5:7, Proverbs 3:5-6 and Exodus 14:13-14 are some of my favorite scriptures to remember during uncertain times).fullsizerender-28
  2. Get organized.  This may sound insignificant to some, but for me personally, it’s very significant.  I’m still a work in progress in this area, but the more organized I become, the better I feel.  I’ve never found anything good to come out of disorganization, but I’ve always found something good to come out of organization.  Being disorganized wastes time and money, while simply creating unneeded stress.  Even when life feels “messy”…..I feel just a little better knowing I have an organized home, car and work space.  img_2080
  3. Purge and get rid of things you don’t need.  The older I get, the more I hate clutter.  God began dealing with me concerning clutter a few years ago.  For six weeks of my l life, I ended up in a situation where I had to live with “less.”  While I stayed between friend’s homes, I had a little amount of “stuff” with me.  I was able to focus more on people and the things of God.  I realized I had enough, and I didn’t miss all the stuff back at my apartment.  I then moved all that junk to my new home, but let me tell you, it wasn’t long before I did the biggest closest cleaning of my life.  I recruited my sister and opinionated guy friend to act like judges on the “What not to wear,” show.  I told them to be brutal during my “fashion show.” By the time they were done saying things like, “you don’t need that,” “that’s hideous,” and “what were you thinking when you bought that,” my closet was about 50% lighter.  I’m still working on purging, but I’d say I’ve downsized my possessions by at least 25% since buying my new home.  Purging is also great, because you have the options of giving these items to someone in need or selling them to make money…..or both.  If part of your issue is finances, sometimes a nice secondary income can happen by simply selling things you don’t need.  Ebay and yard sales is where it’s at, friends. Ever since God placed the words, “where there is clutter, there is no clarity,” in my spirit…I’ve been taking this whole decluttering thing pretty serious.fullsizerender-32
  4. Avoid drama and toxic people.  Although this may seem like common sense, it’s a common struggle area for many.  Myself included.  I’ve heard it said, “show me your friends, and I’ll show you your future.” Just one toxic person in a boat is all it takes to sink it.  Though there will always be invites to various theatrical performances, we don’t have to attend them.  Instead of RSVP’ing with a “yes,”….remember you have the “no” option.  We also don’t have to suit up for every battle we’re invited to.  Failure to choose battles wisely will end up resulting in constant combat.fullsizerender-11
  5. Surround yourself with positive people and good things.  As an antonym to #4, positivity and good inner circles bring good things.  Positive people and positive environments not surprisingly bring encouragement, support and inspiration, which eventually results in good outcomes.fullsizerender-19
  6. Give away whatever it is that you’re needing.  Need a hug?  Give one. Want a friend?  Be one.  Want love?  Love someone.  When we give away whatever it is we’re needing, we somehow end up more blessed than we would have if we had simply received without giving.  Giving.  It’s good for the soul.  Always has been.  Always will be.cropped-blog.home_.3.jpg
  7. Let go of what you can’t change.  Refusing to let go of what one cannot change is about as useless as shattered glass.  We can’t fix it no matter how much we discuss it, rehearse it and overthink it.  If we’ve done all we can do to make right our wrongs, we’ve done all we can do.  This ties back to #1……give it to God.fullsizerender-15
  8. Rid yourself of bitterness.  I’ve heard it said that holding a grudge is basically letting someone live rent free in one’s head.  It ultimately affects the offended more than the offender.  Like disorganization, I’ve never known of anything good to come from bitterness. Bitterness was created by the devil.  Don’t forget his mission is to steal, kill and destroy.  Hang on to that bitterness, and rest assured, all it will do is steal, kill and destroy you.  Break free and never look back.fullsizerender-36
  9. Be responsible.  If life is already hitting hard, the biggest mistake one can make is to be irresponsible.  Completely neglecting finances and obligations, while taking on a lifestyle of recklessness and carelessness will always result in negative consequences.  Playing catch up results in a lot of clean up, which results in more unnecessary stress.  fullsizerender-7
  10. Be grateful for what you do have.  As simple as it sounds, counting blessings makes all the difference.  When we look at what we do have instead of what we don’t have, it creates an attitude of thankfulness.  Thankfulness is a sibling to contentment.  Though God wants to bless each and every one of us, he doesn’t want us to forget the ways in which we’re already blessed.  Don’t like your current job?  How about you start by writing down ten things you like about the job you do have?  For starters….do they pay you?  Want a new car simply because yours is old and boring?  How about the fact that it runs and you no longer have a car payment?  Did you wake up this morning?  How about that bed and roof over your head?

 

There is always something to be thankful for……always.  Never lose hope.  Always look to him…..the author and the finisher of our faith (Hebrews 12:2).  We can choose peace and joy, while we wait on the vision and the harvest (Habakkuk 2:3 and Galatians 6:9).  He always sees us through, and he always will.

 

Be there for everyone (but don’t let everyone be there for you)

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“Be there for everyone……but don’t let everyone be there for you.”

What does this mean you might ask?

Though this statement may initially sound negative or anti-social, it’s actually just the opposite.  Let me explain.  I’m not at all encouraging us to shut everyone out.  I’m not suggesting we be anti-social, form cliques or live in constant fear that every person we meet is going to hurt us.

The Bible tells us over and over to love one another.  Therefore, it’s our job to help out our fellow humans when we can.  When living a spirit-led life God will speak to us in a variety of ways concerning other people.  Sometimes he may ask us to be a listening ear.  Sometimes he may ask us to hand a struggling stranger that $10 bill in our back pocket.  He also expects us to be respectful, trustworthy and genuine to the people we meet.

One thing God doesn’t instruct us to do, however, is to share every single detail of our lives with every person we meet.  Sometimes we’re meant to be there for someone, but just maybe that person is not meant to be there for us.  Sometimes they need us more than we need them.

Just because you’re genuine, loyal and trustworthy doesn’t mean you can’t sometimes be there for a person who doesn’t quite share your qualities.  Don’t let them be there for YOU though.  You can do one without doing the other.  Just do it as led and hear God on it.  Stay wise in the process.

Still not following me?  Well, to be completely transparent, I’m at the point where I have thousands of acquaintances.  Many, many of these acquaintances I have are incredible people.  They’re the kind of people that I wish I could know better.  However, the reality is, I can’t share my life on a deep level with everyone.  Honestly, I don’t think any of us are meant to.  God knows if I shared the deep details of my life with EVERY acquaintance I have, I would not only have zero time for those closest to me, but I would also have some unnecessary drama.  He knows that in general I’d be spread really really thin.

I’d also receive a lot of conflicting advice from a lot of conflicting viewpoints.  Therefore, I would end up conflicted and confused.  Once we reach that point of confusion, we can rest assured, we have sought worldly counsel instead of God’s counsel.

How do I know?  I know because for the longest time I tried to be a close friend with as many people as possible.

The result?  I got burnt, felt overwhelmed and just really exhausted.

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The thing is…..God never asked me to try to have a large quantity of deep friendships.  He did begin speaking to me about quality of friendships, however.

God wants us to be loving to all at all times…..but I believe he also wants us to be wise.  There’s a difference between the two.  We can be completely open, personable, approachable and even transparent on a healthy level, without revealing every single personal detail to everyone.

So back to “be there for everyone…..but don’t let everyone be there for you.”

If God puts a hurting person in our paths, by all means, I believe we are supposed to be there for them.  I absolutely believe we are to lovingly listen to them and to give them biblical advice if they’re there for advice.  Also, I believe that unless they are wanting to harm themselves or someone else, we should keep it confidential.  Their lives are not a reality show, and it’s wrong to gossip about another person’s struggles.

It goes back to Luke 6:31:  “Do to others as you would have them do to you.”

If said person confided in you, please be thankful that they see you as someone they can trust and keep your lips sealed.  Then pray for them, encourage them when they pop up or you feel led.  They may keep coming back to you.  They may not.  If you handled them in a Christ-like manner, your positive seeds have been sown and God WILL allow something good to come out of your counsel and your friendship to them.

You may not ever get to witness that good…..but God knows what that good will be and how and when it will play out.

Sometimes we’re just meant to plant a seed.  Sometimes we’re meant to encourage someone long-term.  Sometimes we’re an answer to a person’s prayers for that hour, that day, that week, that month, that year, that decade or that lifetime.  Only God knows which it will be.

Sometimes God puts this struggling person in our lives for a season….a few seasons…..or a lifetime.  I’ve had all types come my way, and I’m just 32.  I wonder how many will be there my whole life.  I wonder how many will pop up again.

Sometimes I’ll find myself wondering what happened to said person.  Sometimes my heart will get a little sad remembering an old random friendship.

“I really thought that person and I would be friends for a lifetime, but we haven’t really talked in four years,” I’ll think.

“I guess life just got busy, and they’ve got other responsibilities now.”

“I guess when someone moves 2,000 miles away, things do change.”

“I briefly remember her, but my memory is fading.”

“It’s funny how we were inseparable for a month, but we just kinda lost touch.”

I can honestly say that 99.9% of my dwindled friendships occur simply because of life.  There’s that 0.1% that ended due to realizing the loyalty or the confidentiality wasn’t reciprocated, but mostly, they dwindle because of life itself.

After watching countless friendships drift apart over the years simply due to seasons of life, busyness or geographical distance, I found myself frustrated.  I also found myself frustrated with that 0.1% where I had trusted and wasn’t paid the same respect in return.

I became tempted to close myself off….and to not let anyone in….but God dealt with me and he still is.

Today, I’m very content with a loving inner circle.  I know who is in my boat.  I know that not everyone belongs in my boat.  I’m not excluding those who are not necessarily in my boat.  I’m all about including them and inviting them into small areas of my life.  I’m certainly all about being a trusting friend to them.

I don’t play the favoritism game, and I’m not bias.  I’ve just had to learn how to be wise.

He’ll never ask you to keep someone in your boat who is trying to sink your boat.  He’ll never ask you to keep around toxic relationships or friendships that steal your joy.

It’s okay to have an inner circle.  In fact, I think that’s very smart.  Just make sure it’s not a closed off clique.  Make sure others feel loved and included.

When we’re showing love and being there for everyone who God places in our path in some small way….we’re doing our jobs.  He never asks us to overexert, to give them ALL our time or to neglect our trusted inner circles in the process.

“Be there for everyone…..but don’t let everyone be there for you.”